WIST

Faith was given to man to lengthen out his reason.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
(Attributed)

I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second time into things that I am most certain of the first time.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
(Attributed)

Consider the postage stamp: Its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
(Attributed)

The best cure for rheumatism is to thank the Lord it ain’t the gout.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
(Attributed)

Every man has his follies — and often they are the most interesting thing he had got.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
(Attributed)

What the moral army needs just now is more rank and file and fewer brigadier generals.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
(Attributed)

It iz better tew know nothing than two know what ain’t so.

[It is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
John Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Sollum Thoughts” (1874)

The trouble with people is not that they don’t know but that they know so much that ain’t so.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia (1874)

Forgiving our enemys haz the same refreshing effekt upon our souls az it duz tew confess our sins.

[Forgiving our enemies has the same refreshing effect upon our souls as it does to confess our sins.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Gnats” (1874)

To be thoroughly good-natured, and yet avoid being imposed upon, shows great strength ov character.

[To be thoroughly good-natured, and yet avoid being imposed upon, shows great strength of character.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Hot Korn” (1874)

“Experience iz a good schoolmaster,” but reason iz a better one.

["Experience is a good schoolmaster," but reason is a better one.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Ink Brats” (1874)

It iz an actewal fackt that most ov us work harder, tew seem happy, than we should have to, to be happy.

[It is an actual fact that most of us work harder, to seem happy, than we should have to, to be happy.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Josh Settles Up with His Correspondents Summarily” (1874)

The man who never makes enny blunders seldum makes enny good hits.

[The man who never makes any blunders seldom makes any good hits.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Kindling Wood” (1874)

Laff every good chance ya kan git, but don’t laff unless yu feal like it, for there ain’t nothing in this world more harty than a good honest laff, nor nothing more hoollow than a hartless one.

[Laugh every good chance you can get, but don't laugh unless you feel like it, for there ain't nothing in this world more hearty than a good, honest laugh, nor nothing more hollow than a heartless one.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Laffing” (1874)

As in a game ov cards, so in the game ov life, we must play what is dealt tew us, and the glory consists, not so mutch in winning, as in playing a poor hand well.

[As in a game of cards, so in the game of life, we must play what is dealt to us, and the glory consists, not so much in winning, as in playing a poor hand well.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Ods and Ens” (1874)
Full text.

We are happy in this world just in proporshun as we make others happy.

[We are happy in this world just in proportion as we make others happy.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Parboils” (1874)

Human happiness konsists in having what yu want, and wanting what yu hav.

[Human happiness consists in having what you want, and wanting what you have.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Plum Pits” (1874)

Trusting to luck is only another name for trusting to laziness.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Plum Pits” (1874)

I never knu a man trubbled with melankolly, who had plenty to dew, and did it.

[I never knew a man troubled with melancholy, who had plenty to do, and did it.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Puddin and Milk” (1874)

Every man haz a perfekt right tew hiz opinyun, provided it agrees with ours.

[Every man has a perfect right to his opinion, provided it agrees with ours.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Ramrods” (1874)

Conversashun should be enlivened with wit, not compozed ov it.

[Conversation should be enlivened with wit, not composed of it.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia, “Sollum Thoughts” (1874)

Politeness haz won more viktorys than logick ever haz.

[Politeness has won more victories than logic ever has.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billings: His Sayings (1865)

Flattery iz like Kolone water, tew be smelt ov, not swallowed.

[Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt of, not swallowed.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billings: His Sayings (1865)

Nature never makes any blunders; when she makes a fool she means it.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billings: His Sayings (1865)

As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billings: His Sayings (1865)

Tew bring up a child in the wa he should go — travel that wa yourself.

[To bring up a child in the way he should go -- travel that way yourself.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billings: His Sayings, 78 (1865)

Education is a good thing generally, but most folks educate their prejudices.

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia (1874)