WIST

Alcohol is nicissary f’r a man so that now an’ thin he can have a good opinion iv himsilf, ondisturbed by th’ facts.

Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936) American humorist and journalist
“Mr. Dooley on Alcohol,” Chicago Tribune (26 Apr 1914)

It’s much more comfortable to feel that we’re a slight improvement on a monkey thin such a fallin’ off fr’m th’ angels.

Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936) American humorist and journalist
“On the Descent of Man,” Mr. Dooley on Making a Will and Other Necessary Evils (1919)

What’s wan man’s news is another man’s throubles.

Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936) American humorist and journalist
“The News of a Week,” Observations by Mr. Dooley (1902)

Th’ past always looks better thin it was. It’s only pleasant because it isn’t here.

Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936) American humorist and journalist
A Family Union, “Mr. Dooley”

Trust everyone, but cut the cards.

Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936) American humorist and journalist
Mr. Dooley’s Opinions, “Casual Observations” (1901)

A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.

Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936) American humorist and journalist
Mr. Dooley’s Opinions, “Casual Observations” (1901)

‘Twas founded be th’ Puritans to give thanks f’r bein’ presarved fr’m th’ Indyans, an’ … we keep it to give thanks we are presarved fr’m th’ Puritans.

Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936) American humorist and journalist
Mr. Dooley’s Opinions, “Thanksgiving” (1900)