WIST

SUSAN:  Sally, does it ever occur to you that age brings wisdom and greater confidence?
SALLY:  Susan, age brings you more to shave.

Steven Moffat (b. 1961) Scottish television writer, producer
Coupling, “Flushed” (12 May 2000)

STEVE: I like naked women. I’m a bloke. I’m supposed to like them. We’re born like that. We like naked women as soon as we’re pulled out of one. Halfway down the birth canal we’re already enjoying the view.

Steven Moffat (b. 1961) Scottish television writer, producer
Coupling, “Inferno” (2 Jun 2000)

[I]t is the four pillars of the male heterosexual psyche. We like: naked women, stockings, lesbians, and Sean Connery best as James Bond, because that is what being a boy is.

Steven Moffat (b. 1961) Scottish television writer, producer
Coupling, “Inferno” [Steve] (2 Jun 2000)

I want to spend the rest of my life with the woman at the end of that table there, but that does not stop me wanting to see several thousand more naked bottoms before I die, because that’s what being a bloke is. When man invented fire, he didn’t say, “Hey, let’s cook.” He said, “Great, now we can see naked bottoms in the dark.” As soon as Caxton invented the printing press, we were using it to make pictures of, hey, naked bottoms! We have turned the Internet into an enormous international database of naked bottoms. So you see, the story of male achievement through the ages, feeble though it may have been, has been the story of our struggle to get a better look at your bottoms.

Steven Moffat (b. 1961) Scottish television writer, producer
Coupling, “Inferno” [Steve] (2 Jun 2000)

SALLY: It’s a scientific fact that if you say “naked” three or more times, to any man, he has to cross his legs.

Steven Moffat (b. 1961) Scottish television writer, producer
Coupling, Ep. 2.8 “Naked” (22 Oct 2001)

JANE: I once went on holiday and pretended to be twins. It was amazing fun. I invented this mad, glamorous sister and went around really annoying everybody. And d’you know, I could get away with anything when I was my crazy twin Jane.

SALLY: But you’re Jane.

JANE: Kinda stuck. It’s a long story.

Steven Moffat (b. 1961) Scottish television writer, producer
Coupling, Ep. 2.9 “The Other End of the Line” (29 Oct 2001)