WIST

Any sufficiently advanced incompetence is indistinguishable from malice.

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Grey’s Law

The code was willing,
It considered your request,
But the chips were weak.

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Haiku error message

A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

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Three things are certain:
Death, taxes, and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

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Yesterday it worked
Today it is not working
Windows is like that

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To have no errors
Would be life without meaning
No struggle, no joy

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Having been erased,
The document you’re seeking
Must now be retyped.

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Everything is gone;
Your life’s work has been destroyed.
Squeeze trigger (yes/no)?

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Errors have occurred.
We won’t tell you where or why.
Lazy programmers.

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wind catches lily
scatt’ring petals to the wind:
segmentation fault

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With searching comes loss
and the presence of absence:
“My Novel” not found.

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The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao, until
You bring fresh toner.

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A crash reduces
your expensive computer
to a simple stone.

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If you’re coasting, you’re going downhill.

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Pierson’s Law

“If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy?”

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“The problem with being too efficient is that once you’ve shown that you can walk on water, every SOB will want you to trot across the lake on errands.”

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“Deja Fu: The feeling that, somehow, somewhere, you’ve been kicked in the head like this before.”

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“Save the whales. Collect the whole set.”

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“I like cats, too. Let’s exchange recipes.”

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“It isn’t what you know that counts, it’s what you think of in time.”

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“A liberal is a conservative who has gone to jail.
A conservative is a liberal who has been mugged.”

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Alternate: "A conservative is a liberal who's been robbed. A liberal is a conservative who has been arrested."

“That’s it, man. Game over, man! It’s game over!”

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“Come, Pinky, or I shall have to hurt you.”

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“Where’s the kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth-shattering kaboom!”

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“Pinky, are you pondering what I’m pondering?”
“I think so, Brain, but me and Pippi Longstocking? I mean, what would the children look like?”

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“Pinky, are you pondering what I’m pondering?”
“I think so, Brain, but this time you put the trousers on the chimp.”

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“Pinky, are you pondering what I’m pondering?”
“I think so, Brain, but burlap chafes me so.”

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“Anyone who isn’t confused here doesn’t really know what’s going on.”

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“I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates who said: ‘I drank what?’”

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“The NSA is now funding research not only in cryptography, but in all areas of advanced mathematics. If you’d like a circular describing these new research opportunities, just pick up your phone, call your mother, and ask for one.”

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