Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate, or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such.
Henry Miller (1891-1980) American novelist
The World of Sex (1940)
Quotations about:
acceptance
Note not all quotations have been tagged, so Search may find additional quotes on this topic.
For after all, the best thing one can do
When it is raining, is to let it rain.Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807-1882) American poet
Tales of a Wayside Inn, “The Poet’s Tale; The Birds of Killingworth” (1863)
We cannot change anything unless we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses. I am the oppressor of the person I condemn, not his friend and fellow-sufferer. I do not in the least mean to say that we must never pass judgment in the case of persons whom we desire to help and improve. But if the doctor wishes to help a human being he must be able to accept him as he is. And he can do this in reality only when he has already seen and accepted himself as he is.
Carl Jung (1875-1961) Swiss psychologist
Modern Man In Search of a Soul (1933)
I suppose the process of acceptance will pass through the usual four stages:
1. This is worthless nonsense,
2. This is an interesting, but perverse, point of view,
3. This is true, but quite unimportant,
4. I always said so.J.B.S. Haldane (1892-1964) English geneticist [John Burden Sanderson Haldane]
“The Truth About Death,” Journal of Genetics, Vol. 58, page 464 (1963)
(Source)
Review of The Chester Beatty Research Institute Serially Abridged Life Tables, England and Wales, 1841-1960. Referring to the stages a scientific theory goes through.
Make the best of what is in our power, and take the rest as it naturally happens.
Epictetus (c.55-c.135) Greek (Phrygian) Stoic philosopher
The Discourses, 1.1
The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.
Buddha (c.563-483 BC) Indian mystic, philosopher [b. Siddharta Gautama]
In Bukkyõ Dendõ Kyõkai, The Teaching of Buddha (1966)
Likely a paraphrase of a variety of the Buddha's teachings.
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let ’em go, because man, they’re gone.
Jack Handey (b. 1949) American humorist
Deeper Thoughts (1993)
Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking. Don’t settle.
Steve Jobs (1955-2011) American computer inventor, entrepreneur
Commencement Address, Stanford University (2005)
(Source)
If a problem has no solution, it may not be a problem, but a fact, not to be solved, but to be coped with over time.
Shimon Peres (1923-2016) Polish-Israeli politician, statesman
(Attributed)
Widely attributed to Peres in different sources. Quoted in the Wall Street Journal (7 Feb 2001). Donald Rumsfeld says that Peres made the observation to him.
To accept passively an unjust system is to cooperate with that system; thereby the oppressed become as evil as the oppressor. Non-cooperation with evil is as much a moral obligation as is cooperation with good. The oppressed must never allow the conscience of the oppressor to slumber. Religion reminds every man that he is his brother’s keeper. To accept injustice or segregation passively is to say to the oppressor that his actions are morally right. It is a way of allowing his conscience to fall asleep. At this moment the oppressed fails to be his brother’s keeper. So acquiescence — while often the easier way — is not the moral way. It is the way of the coward.
Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968) American clergyman, civil rights leader, social activist, preacher
Stride Toward Freedom, ch. 11 “Where Do We Go from Here?” (1958)
(Source)
I do not know many Negroes who are eager to be “accepted” by white people, still less to be loved by them; they, the blacks, simply don’t wish to be beaten over the head by the whites every instant of our brief passage on this planet. White people will have quite enough to do in learning how to accept and love themselves and each other, and when they have achieved this — which will not be tomorrow and may very well be never — the Negro problem will no longer exist, for it will no longer be needed.
James Baldwin (1924-1987) American novelist, playwright, activist
“Letter from a Region of My Mind,” The New Yorker (17 Nov 1962)
Republished as "Down at the Cross: Letter from a Region in My Mind" in The Fire Next Time (1963)
Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you.
Elbert Hubbard (1856-1915) American writer, businessman, philosopher
A Thousand and One Epigrams (1911)
(Source)
Reprinted in The Notebook of Elbert Hubbard (1927).
DESTRUCTION: It’s astonishing how much trouble one can get oneself into, if one works at it. And astonishing how much trouble one can get oneself out of, if one simply assumes that everything will, somehow or other, work out for the best.
Neil Gaiman (b. 1960) British author, screenwriter, fabulist
Sandman, Book 10. The Wake, # 72 “Chapter 3, In Which We Wake” (1995-11)
(Source)
That was excellently observed, say I, when I read a passage in an author, where his opinion agrees with mine. When we differ, there I pronounce him to be mistaken.
Jonathan Swift (1667-1745) English writer and churchman
“Thoughts on Various Subjects” (1706)
(Source)
Destiny leads the willing, but drags the unwilling.
Thomas Fuller (1654-1734) English physician, preacher, aphorist, writer
Gnomologia: Adages and Proverbs, #1275 (1732)
(Source)
See Seneca the Younger.
‘Yes, sir,’ said Jeeves in a low, cold voice, as if he had been bitten in the leg by a personal friend.
P. G. Wodehouse (1881-1975) Anglo-American humorist, playwright and lyricist [Pelham Grenville Wodehouse]
Carry On, Jeeves (1925)
All living souls welcome whatever they are ready to cope with; all else they ignore, or pronounce to be monstrous and wrong, or deny to be possible.
George Santayana (1863-1952) Spanish-American poet and philosopher [Jorge Agustín Nicolás Ruíz de Santayana y Borrás]
Dialogues in Limbo (1926)
And thou wilt give thyself relief if thou doest every act of thy life as if it were the last, laying aside all carelessness and passionate aversion from the commands of reason, and all hypocrisy, and self-love, and discontent with the portion which has been given to thee.
Marcus Aurelius (AD 121-180) Roman emperor (161-180), Stoic philosopher
Meditations, Book 2, #5 [tr. Long (1862)]
(Source)
Usually modernized, "And you will give yourself relief, if you do every act of your life as if it were the last, laying aside all carelessness and passionate aversion from the commands of reason, and all hypocrisy, and self-love, and discontent with the portion which has been given to you," and the source of the more common (and mixed-message) reduction of this aphorism, "Do every act of your life as if it were your last."
Alternate translations:
Go about every action as thy last action, free from all vanity, all passionate and wilful aberration from reason, and from all hypocrisy, and self-love, and dislike of those things, which by the fates or appointment of God have happened unto thee.
[tr. Casaubon (1634), #2]
Perform every action as if it were your last; if your appetites and passions do not cross upon your reason; if you keep clear of rashness, and have nothing of insincerity and self-love to infect you, and do not complain of your destiny.
[tr. Zimmern (1887)]
Do each act as though it were your last, freed from every random aim, from wilful turning away from the directing Reason, from pretence, self-love and displeasure with what is allotted to you.
[tr. Farquharson (1944)]
Approach each action as though it were your last, dismissing the wayward thought, the emotional recoil from the commands of reason, the desire to create an impression, the admiration of self, the discontent with your lot.
[tr. Staniforth (1964)]
Perform every action in your life as if it were your last, putting aside all aimlessness and emotional resistance to the choices of reason, and all pretense, selfishness, and discontent with what has been allotted to you.
[tr. Needleman/Piazza (2008)]
You have to accept whatever comes and the only important thing is that you meet it with courage and with the best you have to give.
Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962) First Lady of the US (1933-45), politician, diplomat, activist
In Edward P. Morgan (ed.) This I Believe … (1952)
No one imagines that a symphony is supposed to improve in quality as it goes along, or that the whole object of playing it is to reach the finale. The point of music is discovered in every moment of playing and listening to it. It is the same, I feel, with the greater part of our lives, and if we are unduly absorbed in improving them we may forget altogether to live them.
To be interested in the changing seasons is, in this middling zone, a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring.
George Santayana (1863-1952) Spanish-American poet and philosopher [Jorge Agustín Nicolás Ruíz de Santayana y Borrás]
The Life of Reason or The Phases of Human Progress, Vol. 4 “Reason in Art,” ch. 9 “Justification of Art” (1905-06)
Full text.
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
Aristotle (384-322 BC) Greek philosopher
(Spurious)
First attributed to Aristotle in Lowell L. Bennion, Religion and the Pursuit of Truth (1959). Unfound as such.
Sometimes thought (though I feel it's a bit of a stretch) a misinterpretation of Nicomachean Ethics 1.3.4 (1094b): "For it is the mark of an educated person to search for the same kind of clarity in each topic to the extent that the nature of the matter accepts it."
More discussion of this quotation:
And this made me remember that common saying everyone in China was raised with: “If you can’t change your fate, change your attitude.”
Amy Tan (b. 1952) American novelist
The Kitchen God’s Wife, ch. 17 (1991)
(Source)
Usually quoted without the attribution to a common saying.
LADY MACBETH: Things without all remedy
Should be without regard: what’s done is done.William Shakespeare (1564-1616) English dramatist and poet
Macbeth, Act 3, sc. 2, l. 13ff [Lady Macbeth] (1606)
(Source)
A man dies when he refuses to stand up for that which is right. A man dies when he refuses to stand up for justice. A man dies when he refuses to take a stand for that which is true.
Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968) American clergyman, civil rights leader, social activist, preacher
Sermon, Selma, Alabama (8 Mar 1965)
Possibly the source of the uncited attributions (or variants) "Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" and "The day we see the truth and cease to speak is the day we begin to die."
In all affairs — love, religion, politics or business — it’s a healthy idea, now and then, to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970) English mathematician and philosopher
(Attributed)
Widely attributed to Russell, but not found in any of his online published works or cited to any source.
There are numerous variations on this quote, e.g.,
In all affairs it's a healthy idea now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have taken for granted.
And mixes and matches between those two.
Earliest references of long-form quotation I could find:I also found in Alexander Chittick, Social Evolution, "The Evolution of Capital and Labor" (1919), regarding the plight of laborers:
- Readers Digest, "Quotable Quotes" filler (1940-08)
- Forbes, "Thoughts on the Business of Life" (1950-02-01)
They should be taught [...] to take nothing for granted in love, religion, politics, or business.
The combination of taking for granted and the same list of four affair topics seems more than coincidence. Was Chittick riffing off of an unfound Russell comment? Did someone attribute a variation of Chittick's passage to Russell? The answer is unclear.
It is better to debate a question without settling it, than to settle it without debate.
[Il vaut mieux remuer une question sans la décider, que la décider sans la remuer.]
Joseph Joubert (1754-1824) French moralist, philosopher, essayist, poet
Pensées [Thoughts], ch. 8 “De la Famille et de la Société, etc. [On the Family and Society]” ¶ 71 (1850 ed.) [tr. Attwell (1896), ¶ 115]
(Source)
(Source (French)). Alternate translations:
It is better to stir a question without deciding it, than to decide it without stirring it.
[tr. Calvert (1866), ch. 8]
It is better to turn over a question without deciding it, than to decide it without turning it over.
[tr. Lyttelton (1899), ch. 7, ¶ 61]
It is better to stir up a question without deciding it, than to decide it without stirring it up.
[tr. Collins (1928), ch. 7]
It is better to debate a question without settling it than to settle a question without debating it.
[Variant]
The highest result of education is tolerance. Long ago men fought and died for their faith; but it took ages to teach them the other kind of courage, — the courage to recognize the faiths of their brethren and their rights of conscience. Tolerance is the first principle of community; it is the spirit which conserves the best that all men think.
For it is the part of a wise man to resolve beforehand that whatever can happen to a brave man is to be endured with patience if it should happen. It is indeed a proof of altogether greater wisdom to act with such foresight as to prevent any such thing from happening; but it is a token of no less courage to bear it bravely if it should befall one.
[Est enim sapientis, quidquid homini accidere possit, id praemeditari ferendum modice esse, si evenerit. Majoris omnino est consilii providere ne quid tale accidat, animi non minoris fortiter ferre si evenerit.]
Marcus Tullius Cicero (106-43 BC) Roman orator, statesman, philosopher
Philippics, No. 11, ch. 3 / sec. 7 (11.7) (late Feb AD 43) [tr. Yonge (1903)]
(Source)
(Source (Latin)). Alternate translations:
For it is the part of a wise man to resolve beforehand that whatever can happen to a man should be borne calmly if it should befall him. It needs altogether great judgment to provide against such evil happening and no less courage to bear it with fortitude if it should befall.
[tr. Ker (1926)]
It is the mark of a wise man ever to consider, reflect, that whatever may happen to him should be borne with patience. It is, however, a mark of greater wisdom to take every precaution against the occurrence of any thing unpleasant, of a reverse of fortune; but it is an indication of a mind in no wise inferior bravely and manfully to submit to any change of fortune, however unpleasant, untoward, unfavorable, unpropitious.
[Source]
This appears to the the source of the paraphrase: "To yield to occasion is the mark of a wise man."
CASSIUS: Why, man, he doth bestride the narrow world
Like a Colossus, and we petty men
Walk under his huge legs and peep about
To find ourselves dishonourable graves.
Men at some time are masters of their fates:
The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,
But in ourselves, that we are underlings.William Shakespeare (1564-1616) English dramatist and poet
Julius Caesar, Act 1, sc. 2, l. 142ff (1.2.142-148) (1599)
(Source)
God, give us the grace to accept with serenity the things which cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.
Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971) American theologian and clergyman
“The Serenity Prayer” (1934)
Niebuhr at one point claimed authorship (and took copyright fees from Hallmark Cards), but later on denied he had written it. It was later adopted by Alcoholics Anonymous. Discussion of the actual authorship here.
