Martial -- Epigrams [Epigrammata], Book 12, epigram 20 (12.20) (AD 101) [tr. McLean (2014)]

Dave — Fri, 12 Aug 2022 20:18:12 +0000

Themison has no wife — and never missed her.
Fabullus, you ask why? He has a sister.

[Quare non habeat, Fabulle, quaeris
Uxorem Themison? Habet sororem.]

Martial (AD c.39-c.103) Spanish Roman poet, satirist, epigrammatist [Marcus Valerius Martialis]
Epigrams [Epigrammata], Book 12, epigram 20 (12.20) (AD 101) [tr. McLean (2014)]
(Source)

"To Fabullus." Both Ker and Shackleton Bailey explicitly note that habet does, in fact, have a secondary meaning of "has sex with." (Source (Latin)). Alternate translations:

You lately were inquiring, why Silvester
Has not yet got a wife? -- He has a sister.
[tr. Hay (1755)]

Why Themison has not a wife, nor e'er missed her,
Fabullus, you ask? Honest Them has a sister.
[tr. Elphinston (1782)]

Do you ask, Fabullus, why Themison has not a wife? He has a sister.
[tr. Bohn's Classical (1859)]

Do you ask, Fabullus, why Themison has not got a wife? He has a sister.
[tr. Ker (1919)]

You wonder how he lives unmarried? Cease
To marvel, for his Reverence has a niece.
[tr. Pott & Wright (1921), "The Alternative"]

Do you ask, dear reader, why Themison
Has no wife? Why, hell!
The reason's rather obvious:
His sister does as well!
[tr. Marcellino (1968)]

Brother never
had a wife
he had sister
all his life.
[tr. Goertz (1971)]

Fabullus, you ask why Themison doesn't have a wife. He has a sister.
[tr. Shackleton Bailey (1993)]

Why no wife? He quickly concedes
His sister takes care of all his needs.
[tr. Ericsson (1995)]

Of course we know he'll never wed.
What? Put his sister out of bed?
[tr. Wills (2007)]

He doesn't need a wife
His sister is enough
[tr. Kennelly (2008), "Enough"]

You want to know, Fabullus, why Themison doesn’t have a wife. He has a sister.
[tr. @aleatorclassicus (2010)]

Fabullus, do you want to know why Mr.
Themison has no wife? He has a sister.
[tr. Powell]

Lehrer, Tom -- “Oedipus Rex,” An Evening (Wasted) with Tom Lehrer (1959)

Dave — Thu, 25 Feb 2016 14:36:05 +0000

Yes, he loved his mother like no other,
His daughter was his sister and his son was his brother.
One thing on which you can depend is,
He sure knew who a boy’s best friend is.

Tom Lehrer (b. 1928) American mathematician, satirist, songwriter
“Oedipus Rex,” An Evening (Wasted) with Tom Lehrer (1959)

WIST Quotations

Martial -- Epigrams [Epigrammata], Book 12, epigram 20 (12.20) (AD 101) [tr. McLean (2014)]

Lehrer, Tom -- “Oedipus Rex,” An Evening (Wasted) with Tom Lehrer (1959)