WIST Quotations

Barry, Dave -- Dave Barry Turns 40, ch. 2 “Your Disintegrating Body” (1990)

Dave — Fri, 27 Mar 2026 16:03:20 +0000

There really are things you can do to keep your body looking healthy and youthful for years to come. But before I discuss these things, I want you to answer the following questions honestly: Are you willing to make the hard sacrifices needed to be really healthy? Are you willing to commit yourself totally to a program of regular exercise, close medical supervision, and the elimination of all caffeine, alcohol, and rich foods, to be replaced by a strict diet of nutrition-rich, kelp-like plant growths so unappetizing that they will make you actually lust for tofu?
Or are you the kind of shallow, irresponsible person who wants a purely cosmetic change, a “quick and dirty” surface gloss that may make you look young and healthy, but actually has no long-term value? Me too.

Dave Barry (b. 1947) American humorist, author, columnist
Dave Barry Turns 40, ch. 2 “Your Disintegrating Body” (1990)
(Source)

Barry, Dave -- Dave Barry Turns 40, ch. 2 “Your Disintegrating Body” (1990)

Dave — Fri, 20 Mar 2026 16:48:11 +0000

Is there something you can do about it? You’re darned right there is! You can fight back. Mister Old Age is not going to get you, by golly! All you need is a little determination — a willingness to get out of that reclining lounge chair, climb into that sweatsuit, lace on those running shoes, stride out that front door, and hurl yourself in front of that municipal bus.
No, wait. Sorry. For a moment there I got carried away by the bleakness of it all. Forget what I said. Really. There is absolutely no need to become suicidally depressed about the fact that every organ in your body is headed straight down the toilet.

Dave Barry (b. 1947) American humorist, author, columnist
Dave Barry Turns 40, ch. 2 “Your Disintegrating Body” (1990)
(Source)

Aristotle -- Rhetoric [Ῥητορική; Ars Rhetorica], Book 1, ch. 1, sec. 12 (1.1.12) / 1355b.1 (350 BC) [tr. Roberts (1924)]

Dave — Fri, 26 Mar 2021 15:29:29 +0000

It is absurd to hold that a man ought to be ashamed of being unable to defend himself with his limbs but not of being unable to defend himself with reason when the use of reason is more distinctive of a human being than the use of his limbs.

[πρὸς δὲ τούτοις ἄτοπον εἰ τῷ σώματι μὲν αἰσχρὸν μὴ δύνασθαι βοηθεῖν ἑαυτῷ, λόγῳ δ᾽ οὐκ αἰσχρόν: ὃ μᾶλλον ἴδιόν ἐστιν ἀνθρώπου τῆς τοῦ σώματος χρείας.]

Aristotle (384-322 BC) Greek philosopher
Rhetoric [Ῥητορική; Ars Rhetorica], Book 1, ch. 1, sec. 12 (1.1.12) / 1355b.1 (350 BC) [tr. Roberts (1924)]
(Source)

(Source (Greek)). Alternate translations:

Absurd were it, if inability to defend oneself, in the case of the body be disgraceful, but in the case of the reason, which is more peculiarly the characteristic of man than the use of his body, be not disgraceful.
[Source (1847)]

It were absurd, if, while it is disgraceful for a man not to be able to assist himself by his person, it were not disgraceful to be unable to do this by his speech, which is more a peculiarity of man than the exercise of the body.
[tr. Buckley (1850)]

It would be absurd that, while incapacity for physical self-defence is a reproach, incapacity for mental defence should be none; mental effort being more distinctive of man than bodily effort.
[tr. Jebb (1873)]

It would be absurd if it were considered disgraceful not to be able to defend oneself with the help of the body, but not disgraceful as far as speech is concerned, whose use is more characteristic of man than that of the body.
[tr. Freese (1926)]

It would make no sense for an inability to defend oneself by physical means to be a source of shame, while an inability to defend oneself by verbal means was not, since the use of words is more specifically human than the use of the body.
[tr. Waterfield (2018)]

It is strange if it is a shameful thing not to be able to come to one's own aid with one's body but not a shameful thing to be unable to do so by means of argument, which is to a greater degree a human being's own than is the use of the body.
[tr. Bartlett (2019)]

Beecher, Henry Ward -- Norwood; or, Village Life in New England, Vol. 1 (1867)

Dave — Mon, 11 Jan 2016 17:20:20 +0000

The body is like a piano, and happiness is like music. It is needful to have the instrument in good order.

Henry Ward Beecher (1813-1887) American clergyman and orator
Norwood; or, Village Life in New England, Vol. 1 (1867)