About one haff the pitty in this world iz not the result ov sorrow, but satisfackshun that it aint our hoss that haz had hiz leg broke.

[About one half the pity in this world is not the result of sorrow, but satisfaction that it ain’t our hoss that has his leg broke.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist, aphorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]

Josh Billings: His Works, Complete (1873)