Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren’t lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.

Dorothy Parker (1893-1967) American writer
“Résumé,” New York World (16 Aug 1925)
    (Source)

Reprinted in Enough Rope (1926). Parker attempted suicide several times, by a variety of methods.
Added on 3-Sep-07 | Last updated 22-Jun-20
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1 Response to “Résumé,” New York World (16 Aug 1925)

  1. Now there’s some admirable determination for you!

    Razors pain you, Rivers are damp, Acids stain you, And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren’t lawful, Nooses give, Gas smells awful. You might as well live. — Dorothy Parker (1893-1967)…

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