Oh, wouldn’t it be wonderful if some manufacturer would make a toy as tough, as staunch, as hard to crack open as the carton it comes in!

Jean Kerr (1922–2003) American author and playwright [b. Bridget Jean Collins]
Essay (1970 ca.), “I Saw Mommy Kicking Santa Claus,” Penny Candy
    (Source)

Originally published in McCall's Magazine, but I cannot pin down the issue; possibly Vol. 95, No. 3 (1967-12).