You have no control over your cat! You can’t say to your cat, “Cat, heel! Stay! Wait! Lie down! Roll over!” ‘Cause the cat’s just gonna be sitting there going, “Interesting words … have you finished?” While you’re shouting all this to your cat, your dog’s next to you, going … [mimes obeying all commands] “What the hell are you doing? I’m talking to the cat!” “Oh, I’m sorry!”

Eddie Izzard (b. 1962) British comedian
Unrepeatable (1994)

 
Added on 27-Dec-11 | Last updated 27-Dec-11
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