Being on a ship is something like being pregnant. You can sit there and do absolutely nothing but stare at the water and have the nicest sense that you are accomplishing something.

Jean Kerr (1922–2003) American author and playwright [b. Bridget Jean Collins]

Essay (1970 ca.), “Confessions of a Sea-lubber,” Holiday magazine
    (Source)

Specific issue of Holiday unknown. Collected in Penny Candy (1970).