I might be swimming in a crystal pool
I might be wooing some delicious dame
I might be drinking something long and cool
I can’t imagine why I play this game.

A. P. Herbert (1890-1971) English humorist, novelist, playwright, politician [Alan Patrick Herbert; pseud. Albert Haddock]
“Ninth Wicket,” st. 1, l. 13ff, Mild and Bitter (1935)
    (Source)

Originally published in Punch.