Quotations by Wright, Steven


In relativity theory, space and time are the same thing. Einstein discovered this when he kept showing up three miles late for his meetings.

Steven Wright (b. 1955) Canadian-American humorist
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.

Steven Wright (b. 1955) Canadian-American humorist
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.

Steven Wright (b. 1955) Canadian-American humorist
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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Factorials were somebody’s attempt to make math look exciting.

Steven Wright (b. 1955) Canadian-American humorist
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.

Steven Wright (b. 1955) Canadian-American humorist
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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