Philosophy iz a fust rate thing to hav, but yu kant alleviate the gout with it, unless the gout happens to be on sum other phellow.

[Philosophy is a first rate thing to have, but you can’t alleviate the gout with it, unless the gout happens to be on some other fellow.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist, aphorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]

Josh Billings’ Trump Kards, ch. 2 “Grand Pa” (1874)
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