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History is the only consolation left to the peoples, for it teaches them that their ancestors were as unhappy as themselves, or more unhappy.
 
[En effet, il ne reste guère, pour consoler les peuples, que de leur apprendre que leurs ancêtres ont été aussi malheureux, ou plus malheureux.]

Nicolas Chamfort
Nicolas Chamfort (1741-1794) French writer, epigrammist (b. Nicolas-Sébastien Roch)
Products of Perfected Civilization [Produits de la Civilisation Perfectionée], Part 1 “Maxims and Thoughts [Maximes et Pensées],” ch. 8, ¶ 474 (1795) [tr. Mathers (1926)]
    (Source)

(Source (French)). Alternate translations:

In fact there is no longer any way of consoling the people except by teaching them that their forebears were as wretched as they are, or more so.
[tr. Merwin (1969)]

Indeed, if one is to console the peoples of the world there is little else one can do but teach them that their ancestors were just as wretched, or more so.
[tr. Pearson (1973)]

In effect, there is nearly no way to console peoples except to tell them that their ancestors were as unfortunate or more unfortunate than they are.
[tr. Siniscalchi (1994), ¶ 473]

 
Added on 18-Mar-24 | Last updated 18-Mar-24
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I don’t know ov a better kure for sorrow than tew pity sum boddy else.

[I don’t know of a better cure for sorrow than to pity somebody else.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist, aphorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Everybody’s Friend, Or; Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia and Proverbial Philosophy of Wit and Humor, ch. 130 “Affurisms: Puddin & Milk” (1874)
    (Source)

See also this Billings.
 
Added on 14-Mar-24 | Last updated 14-Mar-24
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Wedlock, as old Men note, hath likened been,
Unto a publick Crowd or common Rout;
Where those that are without would fain get in,
And those that are within would fain get out.

Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) American statesman, scientist, philosopher, aphorist
Poor Richard (1734 ed.)
    (Source)

See also Montaigne, Burton, Antrim.
 
Added on 11-Mar-24 | Last updated 11-Mar-24
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You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from.

Cormac McCarthy (1933-2023) American novelist, playwright, screenwriter
No Country for Old Men (2005)
    (Source)
 
Added on 6-Mar-24 | Last updated 6-Mar-24
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Childhood is the world of miracle and wonder; as if creation rose, bathed in light out of the darkness, utterly new and fresh and astonishing. The end of childhood is when things cease to astonish us. When the world seems familiar, when one has got used to existence, one has become adult. The brave new world, the wonderland has grown trite and commonplace.
 
[L’enfance c’est le monde du miracle ou du merveilleux: c’est comme si la creation surgissait, lumineuse, de la nuit, toute neuve et toute fraîche, et tout étonnante. Il n’y a plus d’enfance à partir du moment où les choses ne sont plus étonnantes. Lorsque le monde vous semble «déja vu», lorsqu’on s’est habitué à l’existence, on devient adulte. Le monde de la féerie, la merveille neuve se fait banalité, cliché.]

Eugene Ionesco
Eugène Ionesco (1912-1994) Romanian-French dramatist
Fragments of a Journal [Journal en Miettes], “The Crisis of Language” (1967) [tr. Stewart (1968)]
    (Source)
 
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And what is shameful if those who do it don’t think it so?

[τί δ’ αἰσχρὸν ἢν μὴ τοῖσι χρωμένοις δοκῇ]

Euripides (485?-406? BC) Greek tragic dramatist
Æolus [Αἴολος], frag. 19 (TGF) [tr. Aleator (2012)]
    (Source)

This bit of moral relativism (likely coming from Macareus, the son of Aeolus, who committed incest with his sister, Canace) continues to provoke commentary, thus varied translations. Aristophanes includes a reference to this line in his The Frogs.

Nauck frag. 19, Barnes frag. 5, Musgrave frag. 1. (Source (Greek)). Alternate translations:

But what is base, if it appear not base
To those who practice what their soul approves?
[tr. Wodhull (1809)]

What is shameful, if it does not seem to be so to those who do it?
[Source]

What's wrong if they who do it think not so?
[Source (1902)]

Why shameful, if it does not seem so to those who practice it?
[Source (2018)]

 
Added on 6-Feb-24 | Last updated 6-Feb-24
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If you reside in a state where you attain your legal majority while still in your teens, pretend that you don’t. There isn’t an adult alive who would want to be contractually bound by a decision he came to at the age of nineteen.

Fran Lebowitz (b. 1950) American journalist
“Tips for Teens,” Social Studies (1981)
    (Source)
 
Added on 1-Feb-24 | Last updated 1-Feb-24
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Usbek, it seems to me that we always judge things by secretly relating them to our own concerns. I am not surprised that black men envision the devil as being a brilliant white color, and that they picture their gods as being black as coal — nor that certain peoples picture Venus as having breasts that hang down to her thighs — nor that all idolaters have always pictured their gods in human form, ascribing to them all their own predilections. It has been well said that if triangles had a god, they would imagine him as having three sides.

[Il me semble, Usbek, que nous ne jugeons jamais des choses que par un retour secret que nous faisons sur nous-mêmes. Je ne suis pas surpris que les nègres peignent le diable d’une blancheur éblouissante et leurs dieux noirs comme du charbon ; que la Vénus de certains peuples ait des mamelles qui lui pendent jusqu’aux cuisses ; et qu’enfin tous les idolâtres aient représenté leurs dieux avec une figure humaine, et leur aient fait part de toutes leurs inclinations. On a dit fort bien que, si les triangles faisoient un dieu, ils lui donneroient trois côtés.]

Charles-Lewis de Secondat, Baron de Montesquieu (1689-1755) French political philosopher
Persian Letters [Lettres Persanes], Letter 59, Rica to Usbek (1721) [tr. MacKenzie (2014)]
    (Source)

The triangles reference is often attributed directly to Montesquieu, though it's referenced here as having another origin. It is sometimes cited as a Jewish or Yiddish proverb.

Some early editions leave out the triangle metaphor altogether, thinking it alludes to the Trinity.

See also Voltaire.

(Source (French)). Alternate translations:

It is my Opinion, Usbek, that we never judge of Things but with a private View to our selves. I am not surprised that the Negroes shou'd paint the Devil of the most glaring Whiteness, and their Gods as black as a Coal; that the Venus of some Nations shou'd have Breasts hanging down to her very Thighs; and lastly, that all Idolaters have represented their Gods with a Human Figure, and given them all their own Inclinations. It has been said with good Reason that if the Triangles were to make a God they wou'd give him three Sides.
[tr. Ozell (1736), No. 57]

It appears to me, Usbek, that we never judge of things but with a private view to ourselves. I do not wonder that the Negroes paint the devil in the most glaring whiteness, and their gods as black as a coal; that the Venus of some nations should be represented with breasts pendent to her thighs; nor indeed that all idolaters have made their gods of human figures, and have ascribed to them all their own passions.
[tr. Floyd (1762)]

It seems to me, Usbek, that our opinions are always influenced by a secret application to ourselves. I am not surprised that Negroes paint the devil with a complexion of dazzling whiteness, and their gods as black as coal; that the Venus of certain races has breasts that hang down to her thighs; and finally, that all idolaters have represented their gods in the likeness of men, and have ascribed to them all their own passions. It has been very well said, that if triangles were to make to themselves gods, they would give them three sides.
[tr. Davidson (1891)]

It seems to me, Usbek, that our judgment of things is always controlled by the secret influence they have had on our own actions. I am not surprised that the negroes paint the devil with a face of dazzling whiteness, and their gods as black as coal; that the Venus of certain tribes has breasts that hang down to her thighs; and, in fine, that all nations have represented their gods in the human form, and have supposed them to be imbued with their own passions. It has been very well said that if triangles were to make a god for themselves, they would give him three sides.
[tr. Betts (1897)]

It seems to me, Usbek, that we judge things only by applying them secretly to ourselves. I am not surprised that Negroes paint the devil in dazzling white and their gods in carbon black; or that the Venus of certain peoples has breasts that hang to her thighs; or, finally, that all idolaters have represented their gods in human shape and assign to them all their own attributes. It is well said that if triangles were to create a god, they would describe him with three sides.
[tr. Healy (1964)]

It seems to me, Usbek, that we never judge anything without secretly considering it in relation to our own self. I am not surprised that black men depict the devil as brilliantly white, and their own gods as coal-black, that the Venus of certain peoples has breasts that hang down to her thighs, and, in short, that all idolaters have depicted their gods with human faces, and have endowed them with their own propensities. It has been quite correctly observed that if triangles were to make themselves a god, they would give him three sides.
[tr. Mauldon (2008), No. 57]

 
Added on 30-Jan-24 | Last updated 30-Jan-24
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On a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone will drop to zero.

Chuck Palahniuk (b. 1962) American novelist and freelance journalist
Fight Club, ch. 2 (1997)
    (Source)

The phrase also shows up later in the book, in ch. 24: "On a long enough time line, everyone's survival rate drops to zero."

In the 1999 movie adaptation (screenplay by Jim Uhls), the Narrator's line is "On a long enough time line the survival rate for everyone drops to zero."
 
Added on 30-Jan-24 | Last updated 30-Jan-24
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I’ve come up with a set of rules that describe our reactions to technologies:

1. Anything that is in the world when you’re born is normal and ordinary and is just a natural part of the way the world works.

2. Anything that’s invented between when you’re fifteen and thirty-five is new and exciting and revolutionary and you can probably get a career in it.

3. Anything invented after you’re thirty-five is against the natural order of things.

Douglas Adams (1952-2001) English writer
The Salmon of Doubt (2002)
    (Source)
 
Added on 18-Jan-24 | Last updated 19-Jan-24
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Were you to reach the ripe old age of death,
instead of dying prattling in your crib,
would you have more fame in a thousand years?
What are ten centuries to eternity?
Less than the blinking of an eye compared
to the turning of the slowest of the spheres.

[Che voce avrai tu più, se vecchia scindi
da te la carne, che se fossi morto
anzi che tu lasciassi il ‘pappo’ e ’l ‘dindi’,
pria che passin mill’anni? ch’è più corto
spazio a l’etterno, ch’un muover di ciglia
al cerchio che più tardi in cielo è torto.]

Dante Alighieri the poet
Dante Alighieri (1265-1321) Italian poet
The Divine Comedy [Divina Commedia], Book 2 “Purgatorio,” Canto 11, l. 103ff (11.103-108) [Oderisi of Gubbio] (1314) [tr. Musa (1981)]
    (Source)

Dante refers to two childish terms, which various translators note as
  • "pappo" perhaps "father" (padre), or "bread" (pane) or just "baby food" (cf. English "pap")
  • "dindi," probably "money" (danari/denaro)

    (Source (Italian)). Alternate translations:

    Ah! where's your 'vantage, if yon cast away,
    In years, the muddy vesture of decay,
    As when the swathe involves your tender frame?
    Can you suppose her long, sonorious blast,
    Thro' twice six thousand changing Moons, will last?
    Yet, what is that to Heav'n's eternal year? --
    Less, than the quick glance of human eye,
    To that slow movement of the ample Sky,
    That turns around the universal Sphere!
    [tr. Boyd (1802), st. 20-21]

    Shalt thou more
    Live in the mouths of mankind, if thy flesh
    Part shrivel’d from thee, than if thou hadst died,
    Before the coral and the pap were left,
    Or ere some thousand years have passed? and that
    Is, to eternity compar’d, a space,
    Briefer than is the twinkling of an eye
    To the heaven’s slowest orb.
    [tr. Cary (1814)]

    More fame shalt thou enjoy, if once old age
    Wear flesh away, than if thou hadst expired
    Ere left the breast, or coral last admired?
    A thousand years' eternity to thee
    Far shorter than the eyebrow's movement fleet
    To slowest orbit stars of heaven complete.
    [tr. Bannerman (1850)]

    What fame shalt thou have more, if old peel off
    From thee thy flesh, than if thou hadst been dead
    Before thou left the 'pappo' and the 'dindi,'
    Ere pass a thousand years? which is a shorter
    Space to the eterne, than twinkling of an eye
    Unto the circle that in heaven wheels slowest.
    [tr. Longfellow (1867)]

    What fame wilt thou have more, if when it is old thou loose from thee thy flesh, than if thou hadst died before thou hadst left off thy child's prattle, ere a thousand years are past? which beside the eternal is a shorter space than is a movement of the eyelid beside the circle which in heaven turns the slowest.
    [tr. Butler (1885)]

    If thou stripp'st off thy aged flesh, wilt share
    More fame than if thou'dst early died in grace
    Before thou'dst ceased thy childish prattle,
    A thousand years have past? A briefer space
    Beside the eternal, than a glance of the eye
    By that star's orbit, longest whirled through space.
    [tr. Minchin (1885)]

    What more fame shalt thou have, if thou strippest old flesh from thee, than if thou hadst died ere thou hadst left the pap and the chink, before a thousand years have passed? -- which is a shorter space compared to the eternal than a movement of the eyelids to the circle that is slowest turned in Heaven.
    [tr. Norton (1892)]

    What greater fame shalt thou have, if thou strip thee of thy flesh when old, than if thou hadst died ere thou wert done with pap and chink,
    before a thousand years are passed? which is shorter space to eternity than the twinkling of an eye to the circle which slowest is turned in heaven.
    [tr. Okey (1901)]

    What more fame shalt thou have if thou put off thy flesh when it is old than if thou hadst died before giving up pappo and dindi, when a thousand years are past, which is a shorter space to eternity than the twinkling of an eye to the slowest turning circle in the heavens?
    [tr. Sinclair (1939)]

    Wilt thou have more fame if old age unwrap
    Thy bones from withered flesh than if thy race
    Ended ere thou wert done with bib and pap
    Before a thousand years pass, -- shorter space
    To eternity than is a blinked eye-lid
    To the circle in heaven that moves at slowest pace?
    [tr. Binyon (1943)]

    Ten centuries hence, what greater fame hast thou,
    Stripping the flesh off late, than if thou'dst died
    Ere thou was done with gee-ger and bow-wow?
    Ten centuries hence -- and that's a brief tide,
    Matched with eternity, than one eye-wink
    to that wheeled course Heaven's tardiest sphere must ride.
    [tr. Sayers (1955)]

    Though loosed from flesh in old age, will you have
    in, say, a thousand years, more reputation
    than if you went from child's play to the grave?
    What, to eternity, is a thousand years?
    Not so much as the blinking of an eye
    to the turning of the slowest of the spheres.
    [tr. Ciardi (1961)]

    What greater fame will you have if you strip off your flesh when it is old than if you had died before giving up pappo and dindi, when a thousand years have passed, which is a short4er space compared to the eternal than the movement of the eyelids to that circle which is slowest turned in heaven?
    [tr. Singleton (1973)]

    What greater name will you have, if you are old
    When you put aside your flesh, than if you had died
    Before you had given up baby-talk and rattles,
    Once a thousand years have passed? And that is a shorter
    Space to the eternal than the flash of an eyelid
    To the circle which turns in the heavens most slowly.
    [tr. Sisson (1981)]

    Before a thousand years have passed -- a span
    that, for eternity, is less space than
    an eyeblink for the slowest sphere in heaven --
    would you find greater glory if you left
    your flesh when it was old than if your death
    had come before your infant words were spent?
    [tr. Mandelbaum (1982)]

    What more acclaim will you have if you strip off your flesh when it is old, than if you had died before you left off saying ‘pappo’ and ‘dindi,’
    before a thousand years have passed? which is a briefer space compared with eternity than the blinking of an eye to the circle that turns slowest in the sky
    [tr. Durling (2003)]

    What more fame will you have, before a thousand years are gone, if you disburden yourself of your flesh when old, than if you had died before you were done with childish prattle? It is a shorter moment, in eternity, than the twinkling of an eye is to the orbit that circles slowest in Heaven.
    [tr. Kline (2002)]

    What more renown will you have if you strip
    your flesh in age away than if you died
    before you’d left off lisping "Din-dins!", "Penth!"
    when once a thousand years have passed, a space
    that falls far short of all eternity --
    an eye blink to the slowest turning sphere.
    [tr. Kirkpatrick (2007)]

    Will greater fame be yours if you put off
    your flesh when it is old than had you died
    with pappo and dindi still upon your lips
    after a thousand years have passed? To eternity,
    that time is shorter than the blinking of an eye
    is to one circling of the slowest-moving sphere.
    [tr. Hollander/Hollander (2007)]

    Suppose you get to be old, before you discard
    Your flesh, how much more fame will go with your name,
    After a thousand years, if "Pappy" and "Mammy"
    were still on your tongue when you died? And a thousand years
    Compared with life eternal, is like an eyelid
    Flutter compared with the slowest stars int he skies.
    [tr. Raffel (2010)]

 
Added on 15-Dec-23 | Last updated 15-Dec-23
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Shall I tell you the secret of the true scholar? It is this: Every man I meet is my master in some point, and in that I learn of him.

Ralph Waldo Emerson
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882) American essayist, lecturer, poet
“Greatness,” Letters and Social Aims (1876)
    (Source)

This appears to be the origin of the much more common paraphrase (not found in Emerson's works, but popularized by Dale Carnegie in How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936)): "In my walks, every man I meet is my superior in some way, and in that, I learn from him."
 
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We are talking about a nine-month bout of symptoms of varying severity, often including nausea, skin discolorations, extreme bloating and swelling, insomnia, narcolepsy, hair loss, varicose veins, hemorrhoids, indigestion, and irreversible weight gain, and culminating in a physiological crisis which is occasionally fatal and almost always excruciatingly painful. If men were equally at risk from this condition — if they knew their bellies might swell as if they were suffering from end-stage cirrhosis, that they would have to go nearly a year without a stiff drink, a cigarette, or even an aspirin, that they would be subject to fainting spells and unable to fight their way onto commuter trains — then I am sure that pregnancy would be classified as a sexually transmitted disease and abortions would be no more controversial than emergency appendectomies.

Barbara Ehrenreich (b. 1941) American feminist, journalist, political activist
“Hers” column, New York Times (1985-02-07)
    (Source)

Reprinted as "Their Dilemma and Mine," The Worst Years of Our Lives (1990)
 
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To an embalmer there are no good men and bad men. There are only dead men and live men.

H. L. Mencken (1880-1956) American writer and journalist [Henry Lewis Mencken]
A Little Book in C Major, ch. 4, § 15 (1916)
    (Source)
 
Added on 7-Dec-23 | Last updated 7-Dec-23
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The human comedy can keep amusing you, but only if you keep your distance.

Mignon McLaughlin (1913-1983) American journalist and author
The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, ch. 10 (1966)
    (Source)
 
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It is the function of art to renew our perception. What we are familiar with we cease to see. The writer shakes up the familiar scene, and as if by magic, we see a new meaning in it.

Anaïs Nin (1903-1977) Catalan-Cuban-French author, diarist
The Novel of the Future, ch. 2 “Abstraction” (1968)
    (Source)
 
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There is really no way of considering a book independently of one’s special sensations in reading it on a particular occasion. In this as in everything else one must allow a certain relativity. In a sense, one can never read the book that the author originally wrote, and one can never read the same book twice.

Edmund Wilson
Edmund Wilson, Jr. (1895-1972) American writer, literary critic, journalist
The Triple Thinkers, Foreword (1948 ed.)
    (Source)
 
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The eazyest thing for our freinds to diskover in us, and the hardest thing for us to diskover in ourselfs, is that we are growing old.

[The easiest thing for our friends to discover in us, and the hardest thing for us to discover in ourselves, is that we are growing old.]

Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist, aphorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Everybody’s Friend, Or; Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia and Proverbial Philosophy of Wit and Humor, ch. 131 “Affurisms: Plum Pits (1)” (1874)
    (Source)
 
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BEARD, n. The hair that is commonly cut off by those who justly execrate the absurd Chinese custom of shaving the head.

Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914?) American writer and journalist
“Beard,” The Cynic’s Word Book (1906)
    (Source)

Included in The Devil's Dictionary (1911). Originally published in the "Devil's Dictionary" column in the San Francisco Wasp (1881-04-30).
 
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The awareness of the ambiguity of one’s highest achievements (as well as one’s deepest failures) is a definite symptom of maturity.

Paul Tillich (1886-1965) American theologian and philosopher
Quoted in Time (1963-05-17)
    (Source)

Speech given at the 40th Anniversary Dinner for Time, reported in the following week's magazine.
 
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Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

Carnegie - Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday - wist.info quote

Dale Carnegie (1888-1955) American writer, lecturer
How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, Part 10 “How I Conquered Worry” (1948)
    (Source)

Final note by Carnegie on the story "Six Major troubles Hit Me All At Once" by C. I. Blackwood of Oklahoma City.

The phrase was a "rule" Carnegie taught in his adult courses, and he collected many reports from students about how the various rules taught in the course actually worked in their lives. Thus the "remember" above and how the phrase is also mentioned, quoted in the past tense, in the story "I Now Look for the Green Light," by Joseph M. Cotter of Chicago: "I was told over and over that 'today was the tomorrow I had worried about yesterday.'"
 
Added on 8-Nov-23 | Last updated 8-Nov-23
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One of the things that militates against happiness is worry, and that’s one respect in which I’ve become much happier as I’ve grown older. I worry much less and I found a very useful plan in regard to worry, which is to think, “Now what is the very worst thing that could happen?” And then think, “Well, after all it wouldn’t be so very bad a hundred years hence; it probably won`t matter.” After you’ve really made yourself think that, you won`t worry so much. Worry comes from not facing unpleasant possibilities.

Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970) English mathematician and philosopher
Interview by Woodrow Wyatt, BBC TV (1959)

Collected in Bertrand Russell's BBC Interviews (1959) [UK] and Bertrand Russell Speaks His Mind (1960) [US]. Reprinted (abridged) in The Humanist (1982-11/12), and in Russell Society News, #37 (1983-02).
 
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Maturity is a high price to pay for growing up.

Tom Stoppard (b. 1937) Czech-English playwright and screenwriter
Where Are They Now? [Gale] (1970)
    (Source)

The line in the play -- originally broadcast on BBC Radio 3 -- was based on an answer Stoppard himself gave in an interview by Peter Evans, reprinted in David Bailey and Peter Evans, Goodbye Baby and Amen: A Saraband for the Sixties (1969):

It is a very immature thing to worry about one’s stinking youth, but I don’t care: I think age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
 
Added on 20-Oct-23 | Last updated 20-Oct-23
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But genius is nothing more nor less than childhood recovered at will — a childhood now equipped for self-expression with manhood’s capacities and a power of analysis which enables it to order the mass of raw material which it has involuntarily accumulated.
 
[Le génie n’est que l’enfance retrouvée à volonté, l’enfance douée maintenant, pour s’exprimer, d’organes virils et de l’esprit analytique qui lui permet d’ordonner la somme de matériaux involontairement amassée.]

Charles Baudelaire
Charles Baudelaire (1821-1867) French poet, essayist, art critic
“Le Peintre de la Vie Moderne [The Painter of Modern Life],” sec. 3 (1863) [tr. Mayne (1964)]
    (Source)

(Source (French)). Alternate translations:

But genius is simply childhood recovered at will, a childhood now equipped for self-expression, with mature faculties and an analytic spirit which permit him to set in order the mass of raw material he has involuntarily accumulated.
[tr. Kline (2020)]

Genius is only childhood recovered at will, childhood now gifted to express itself with the faculties of manhood and with the analytic mind that allows him to give order to the heap of unwittingly hoarded material.
[Source]

But genius is no more than childhood recaptured at will, childhood equipped now with man’s physical means to express itself, and with the analytical mind that enables it to bring order into the sum of experience, involuntarily amassed.
[Source]

 
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More ease than masters, servants lives afford:
Think on that, Tom; nor wish to be your lord.
On a coarse rug you most securely snore:
Deep sunk in down he counts each sleepless hour.
Anxious betimes to every statesman low
He bows; much lower than to him you bow.
Behold him with a dun at either ear,
“Pray, pay,” the word; a word you never hear.
Fear you a cudgel? view his gouty state;
Which he would change for many a broken pate.
You know no morning qualm; no costly whore:
Think then, though not a lord, that you are more.

[Quae mala sint domini, quae servi commoda, nescis,
Condyle, qui servum te gemis esse diu.
Dat tibi securos vilis tegeticula somnos,
Pervigil in pluma Gaius, ecce, iacet.
Gaius a prima tremebundus luce salutat
Tot dominos, at tu, Condyle, nec dominum.
‘Quod debes, Gai, redde’ inquit Phoebus et illinc
Cinnamus: hoc dicit, Condyle, nemo tibi.
Tortorem metuis? podagra cheragraque secatur
Gaius et mallet verbera mille pati.
Quod nec mane vomis nec cunnum, Condyle, lingis,
Non mavis, quam ter Gaius esse tuus?]

Marcus Valerius Martial
Martial (AD c.39-c.103) Spanish Roman poet, satirist, epigrammatist [Marcus Valerius Martialis]
Epigrams [Epigrammata], Book 9, epigram 92 (9.92) (AD 94) [tr. Hay (1755)]
    (Source)

Masters often think themselves more put-upon than their lazy, "carefree" servants/slaves, as do the rich versus the poor. "To Condylus" (Source (Latin)). Alternate translations:

The weal of a servant, and woe of his lord,
Thou know'st not, who so long hast service abhorr'd.
Securest of slumbers thy coverlet crown:
Thy master, my Condyl, lies watching in down.
Lords many hails he, the chill morn just begun:
Thou own'st no such duty, saluting scarce one.
To him this and that wight: Pray, pay what you ow.
To thee not a mortal pretends to say so.
Thou feat'st but a flogging: he's rackt with the gout.
A thousand sound lashes he'd rather stand out.
Nor sick thou at morning, nor pale with disease:
Who's moire, prithee, thou or thy master at ease?
[tr. Elphinston (1782), Book 4, Part 2, ep. 35]

Of the troubles of a master, and the pleasures of a slave, Condylus, you are ignorant, when you lament that you have been a slave so long. A common rug gives you sleep free from all anxiety; Caius lies awake all night on his bed of down. Caius, from the first dawn of day, salutes with trembling a number of patrons; you, Condylus, salute not even your master. "Caius, pay what you owe me," cries Phoebus on the one side, and Cinnamus on the other; no one makes such a demand on you, Condylus. Do you fear the torturer? Caius is a martyr to the gout in his hands and feet, and would rather suffer a thousand floggings than endure its pains. You indulge neither gluttonous nor licentious propensities. Is not this preferable to being three times a Caius?
[tr. Bohn's Classical (1859)]

The lowliest cot will give thee powerful sleep,
While Caius tosses on his bed of down.
[ed. Harbottle (1897), 9.93.3]

What are a master's ills, what a slave's blessings you do not know, Condylus, who groan that you are so long a slave. Your common rush-mat affords you sleep untoubled; wakeful all night on down, see, Gaius lies! Gaius from early morn salutes trembling many masters; but you, Condylus, not even your master. "What you owe, Gaius, pay," says Phoebus, and after him Cinnamus: this no one Condylus says to you. Do you dread the torturer? By gout in food and hand Gaius is stabbed, and would choose instead to endure a thousand blows. You do not vomit in the morning, nor are you given to filthy vice, Condylus: do you not prefer this to being your Gaius three times over?
[tr. Ker (1919)]

"How easy live the free," you say, and brood
Upon your long but easy servitude.
See Gaius tossing on his downy bed;
Your sleep’s unbroken tho’ the couch be rude;
He pays his call ere chilly dawn be red,
You need not call on him, you sleep instead;
He’s deep in debt, hears many a summons grim
From creditors that you need never dread,
You might be tortured at your master’s whim;
Far worse the gout that racks his every limb;
Think of the morning qualms, his vicious moods.
Would you for thrice his freedom change with him?
[tr. Pott & Wright (1921), "True Servitude"]

Condylus, you lament that you have been so long a slave; you don't know a master's afflictions and a slave's advantages. A cheap little mat gives you carefree slumbers: there's Gaius lying awake all night on feathers. From daybreak on Gaius in fear and trembling salutes so many masters: but you, Condylus, do not salute even your own. "Gaius, pay me back what you owe," says Phoebus, and from yonder so says Cinnamus: nobody says that to you, Condylus. You fear the torturer? Gaius is cut by gout in foot and hand and would rather take a thousand lashes. You don't vomit of a morning or lick a cunt, Condylus; isn't that better than being your Gaius three times over?
[tr. Shackleton Bailey (1993)]

Never the pros & cons of "slave," or "master,"
can you, mourning long servitude, discern.
The cheapest matting yields you dreamless sleep;
Gaius's feather-bed keeps him awake.
From crack of down Gaius respectfully
greets many masters; yours goes ungreeted.
"Pay day, Gaius, pay!" says Phoebus. "Pay! Pay!"
chimes Cinnamus. What man speaks thus to you?
Screw & rack, you dread? Gaius' gout stabs so
he'ld far prefer the thumbscrew or the rack.
You've no hangover habit, oral sex:
is not one life of yours worth three of his?
[tr. Whigham (2001)]

 
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History, like perspective, needs distance. Facts that are too abundantly attested cease, in some degree, to be malleable.

[L’histoire a besoin de lointain, comme la perspective. Les faits et les événements trop attestés ont, en quelque sorte, cessé d’être malléables.]

Joseph Joubert (1754-1824) French moralist, philosopher, essayist, poet
Pensées [Thoughts], ch. 23 “Des Qualités de l’Écrivain et des Compositions Littéraires [On Writers and Literature],” ¶ 119 (1850 ed.) [tr. Lyttelton (1899), ch. 22, ¶ 52]
    (Source)

(Source (French)). Alternate translations:

History needs distance, perspective. Facts and events which are too well attested, cease, in some sort, to be malleable.
[tr. Attwell (1896), ¶ 356]

History, like perspective, has need of distance.
[tr. Auster (1983), 1801]

 
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Approaching eighty I sometimes see myself from a little distance, as a man I know, but not intimately.

John Updike (1932-2009) American writer
“The Full Glass,” The New Yorker (2008-05-19)
    (Source)

Collected in My Father's Tears and Other Stories (2009).
 
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Other people’s truth may comfort us, but only your own persuades us.

Mignon McLaughlin (1913-1983) American journalist and author
The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, ch. 4 (1966)
    (Source)
 
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Death is like thunder in two particulars; we are alarmed at the sound of it; and it is formidable only from that which preceded it.

Charles Caleb "C. C." Colton (1780-1832) English cleric, writer, aphorist
Lacon: Or, Many Things in Few Words, Vol. 2, § 110 (1822)
    (Source)
 
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What we commonly have in our mind when we speak of religion is a definite set of doctrines, of a more or less metaphysical character, formulated in a creed and supported by an organization distinct from the state. And the first thing we have to learn about the religion of the Greeks is that it included nothing of the kind. There was no church, there was no creed, there were no articles. Priests there were, but they were merely public officials, appointed to perform certain religious rites. The distinction between cleric and layman, as we know it, did not exist; the distinction between poetry and dogma did not exist; and whatever the religion of the Greeks may have been, one thing at any rate is clear, that it was something very different from all that we are in the habit of associating with the world.

Lowes Dickinson
G. Lowes Dickinson (1862-1932) British political scientist and philosopher [Goldsworthy "Goldie" Lowes Dickinson]
The Greek View of Life, ch. 1 “Religion,” sec. 1 (1911)
    (Source)
 
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History may be used to support any conclusion, according to the emphasis of our conscious or unconscious principle of selection.

Lowes Dickinson
G. Lowes Dickinson (1862-1932) British political scientist and philosopher [Goldsworthy "Goldie" Lowes Dickinson]
Religion: A Criticism and a Forecast, ch. 1 “Ecclesiasticism” (1906)
    (Source)
 
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Since I do not admit that a person without bias exists, I think the best that can be done with a large-scale history is to admit one’s bias and for dissatisfied readers to look for other writers to express an opposite bias. Which bias is nearer to the truth must be left to posterity.

Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970) English mathematician and philosopher
Autobiography, ch. 13 (1968)
    (Source)
 
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Try as we will, we cannot honestly recall our youth, for we have lost the feel of its main ingredient: suspense.

Mignon McLaughlin (1913-1983) American journalist and author
The Neurotic’s Notebook, ch. 3 (1963)
    (Source)
 
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Courage is not something that you already have that makes you brave when the tough times start. Courage is what you earn when you’ve been through the tough times and you discover they aren’t so tough after all.

Malcolm Gladwell
Malcolm Gladwell (b. 1963) Anglo-Canadian journalist, author, public speaker
David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants (2013)
    (Source)
 
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I pay very little regard to what any young person says on the subject of marriage. If they profess a disinclination for it, I only set it down that they have not yet seen the right person.

Jane Austen
Jane Austen (1775-1817) English novelist
Mansfield Park, ch. 4 [Mrs. Grant] (1814)
    (Source)
 
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I cannot think well of a man who sports with any woman’s feelings; and there may often be a great deal more suffered than a stander-by can judge of.

Jane Austen
Jane Austen (1775-1817) English novelist
Mansfield Park, ch. 36 [Fanny Price] (1814)
    (Source)
 
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There was a time when all these things would have passed me by, like the flitting figures of a theatre, sufficient for the amusement of an hour. But now, I have lost the power of looking merely on the surface. Everything seems to me to come from the Infinite, to be filled with the Infinite, to be tending toward the Infinite. Do I see crowds of men hastening to extinguish a fire? I see not merely uncouth garbs, and fantastic, flickering lights, of lurid hue, like a trampling troop of gnomes — but straightway my mind is filled with thoughts about mutual helpfulness, human sympathy, the common bond of brotherhood, and the mysteriously deep foundations on which society rests; or rather, on which it now reels and totters.

Lydia Maria Child (1802-1880) American abolitionist, activist, journalist, suffragist
Letters from New-York, # 1, 1841-08-19 (1843)
    (Source)
 
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The child thinks of growing old as an almost obscene calamity, which for some mysterious reason will never happen to itself. All who have pass the age of thirty five are joyless grotesques, endlessly fussing about things of no importance and staying alive without, so far as the child can see, having anything to live for. Only child life is real life.

George Orwell (1903-1950) English writer [pseud. of Eric Arthur Blair]
“Such, Such Were the Joys” (1948)
    (Source)
 
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There is no impersonal reason for regarding the interests of human beings as more important than those of animals. We can destroy animals more easily than they can destroy us; that is the only solid basis of our claim to superiority. We value art and science and literature, because these are things in which we excel. But whales might value spouting, and donkeys might maintain that a good bray is more exquisite than the music of Bach. We cannot prove them wrong except by the exercise of arbitrary power. All ethical systems, in the last analysis, depend upon weapons of war.

Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970) English mathematician and philosopher
“If animals could talk,” New York American (1932-09-14)
    (Source)
 
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I have often wondered what turkeys would think of Christmas if they were capable of thought. I am afraid they would hardly regard it as a season of peace and goodwill.

Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970) English mathematician and philosopher
“If animals could talk,” New York American (1932-09-14)
    (Source)
 
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There are no exact directions. There are probably no directions at all. The only things that I am able to recommend at this moment are: a sense of humour; an ability to see the ridiculous and the absurd dimensions of things; an ability to laugh about others as well as about ourselves; a sense of irony; and, of everything that invites parody in this world. In other words: rising above things, or looking at them from a distance; sensibility to the hidden presence of all the more dangerous types of conceit in others, as well as in ourselves; good cheer; an unostentatious certainty of the meaning of things; gratitude for the gift of life and courage to assume responsibility for it; and, a vigilant mind.

Václav Havel (1936-2011) Czech playwright, essayist, dissident, politician
Speech, accepting the “Open Society” Prize, Central European University (24 Jun 1999)
    (Source)
 
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To everything there is a bright side and a dark side; and I hold it to be unwise, unphilosophic, unkind to others, and unhealthy for one’s own soul, to form the habit of looking on the dark side.

Lydia Maria Child (1802-1880) American abolitionist, activist, journalist, suffragist
Letter to Lucy Osgood (1865)
    (Source)
 
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Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.

Philander Johnson
Philander Johnson (1866-1939) American journalist, humorist, lyricist, playwright
“The Colyumist’s Confessional,” Everybody’s Magazine (May 1920)
    (Source)

He refers to the phrase as a "rather unfeeling invitation to end a hard-luck story."
 
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Science and religion are two windows that people look through, trying to understand the big universe outside, trying to understand why we are here. The two windows give different views, but they look out at the same universe. Both views are one-sided, neither is complete. Both leave out essential features of the real world. And both are worthy of respect.

Freeman Dyson
Freeman Dyson (1923-2020) English-American theoretical physicist, mathematician, futurist
“Progress in Religion,” Templeton Prize acceptance speech, Washington National Cathedral (9 May 2000)
    (Source)
 
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Looking back, you can usually find the moment of the birth of new era, whereas, when it happened, it was one day hooked on the tail of another.

John Steinbeck (1902-1968) American writer
Sweet Thursday, ch. 3, sec. 1 (1954)
    (Source)
 
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The greatest men are connected with their own century always through some weakness.

[Die größten Menschen hängen immer mit ihrem Jahrhundert durch eine Schwachheit zuammen.]

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832) German poet, statesman, scientist
Elective Affinities [Die Wahlverwandtschaften], Part 2, ch. 5, “From Ottilie’s Journal [Aus Ottiliens Tagebuche]” (1809) [Niles ed. (1872)]
    (Source)

(Source (German)). Alternate translation:

The greatest human beings are always linked to their century by some weakness.
[tr. Hollingdale (1971)]

 
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When you’re surrounded by people who share the same set of assumptions as you, you start to think that’s reality.

Emil Levine
Emily Levine (1944-2019) American humorist, writer, actress, speaker
“A Theory of Everything,” TED Talk, Monterey, California (Feb 2002)
    (Source)
 
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Unexpected money is a delight. The same sum is a bitterness when you expected more.

Mark Twain (1835-1910) American writer [pseud. of Samuel Clemens]
Letter to Orion Clemens (23 Mar 1878)
    (Source)
 
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Few people remember having been young, and how hard they found it to be chaste and sober.

[Peu de gens se souviennent d’avoir été jeunes, et combien il leur était difficile d’être chastes et tempérants.]

Jean de La Bruyere
Jean de La Bruyère (1645-1696) French essayist, moralist
The Characters [Les Caractères], ch. 11 “Of Mankind [De l’Homme],” § 112 (11.112) (1688) [tr. Stewart (1970)]
    (Source)

(Source (French)). Alternate translations:

Few people remember that they have been young, and how hard it was then to live chaste and temperate.
[Bullord ed. (1696)]

Few People remember they have been Young, and how hard it was then to live Chaste and Temperate.
[Curll ed. (1713)]

Few remember that they have been young, and how hard it was then to live chaste and temperate.
[Browne ed. (1752)]

Few men remember that they have been young, and how hard it was then to live chaste and temperate.
[tr. Van Laun (1885)]

 
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For the world is not to be narrowed till it will go into the understanding (which has been done hitherto), but the understanding to be expanded and opened till it can take in the image of the world, as it is in fact.

[Neque enim arctandus est mundus ad angustias intellectus (quod adhue factum est), sed expandendus intellectus et laxandus ad mundi imaginem recipiendam, qualis invenitur.]

Francis Bacon (1561-1626) English philosopher, scientist, author, statesman
The Great Instauration, “Parsceve ad Historiam,” “Aphorisms on the Composition of the Primary History,” #4 (1620)
    (Source)
 
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Not anything is more responsible for the good old days than the fact that the grownups of one generation always remember the world as it looked to them in their young days, not as it looked to their elders.

No picture available
Marcelene Cox (1900-1998) American writer, columnist, aphorist
“Ask Any Woman” column, Ladies’ Home Journal (1960-05)
    (Source)
 
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The difference between narcissism and self-love is a matter of depth. Narcissus falls in love not with the self, but with an image or reflection of the self — with the persona, the mask. The narcissist sees himself through the eyes of another, changes his lifestyle to conform with what is admired by others, tailors his behavior and expression of feelings to what will please others. Narcissism is eye trouble, voluntary blindness, an agreement to keep up appearances (hence the importance of “style”) and not to look beneath the surface.

Sam Keen
Sam Keen (b. 1931) American author, professor, philosopher
The Passionate Life, ch. 8 (1983)
    (Source)
 
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A book read by a thousand different people is a thousand different books.

Andrei Tarkovsky
Andrei Tarkovsky (1932-1986) Russian film director, screenwriter, film theorist [Андрей Арсеньевич Тарковский]
Sculpting in Time (1986) [tr. Hunter-Blair]
    (Source)
 
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A clever speaker can speak on any
subject, either for or against.

[ἐκ παντὸς ἄν τις πράγµατος δισσῶν λόγων
ἀγῶνα θεῖτ᾽ἄν, εἰ λέγειν εἴη σοφός.]

Euripides (485?-406? BC) Greek tragic dramatist
Antiope [Αντιοπη], frag. 189 (TGF, Kannicht) [Chorus] (c. 410 BC)
    (Source)

Barnes frag. 79, Musgrave 39. (Source (Greek)). Alternate translations:

The skillful orator can either side
Maintain on every topic of debate.
[tr. Wodhall (1809)]

A man could make an argument for two sides of any
matter, if he were a clever speaker.
[tr. Will (2015)]

 
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An awareness of our smallness may help to redeem us from the arrogance which is the besetting sin of the scientists.

Freeman Dyson
Freeman Dyson (1923-2020) English-American theoretical physicist, mathematician, futurist
Infinite in All Directions, Part 1, ch. 1 “In Praise of Diversity” (1988)
    (Source)

Based on a lecture on "Science and Religion," National Conference of Catholic Bishops, Detroit (Sep 1986).
 
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