I don’t believe any man ever existed without vanity, and if he did he would be an extremely uncomfortable person to have anything to do with. He would, of course, be a very good man, and we should respect him very much. He would be a very admirable man — a man to be put under a glass case and shown round as a specimen — a man to be stuck upon a pedestal and copied, like a school exercise — a man to be reverenced, but not a man to be loved, not a human brother whose hand we should care to grip. Angels may be very excellent sort of folk in their way, but we, poor mortals, in our present state, would probably find them precious slow company. Even mere good people are rather depressing.
Jerome K. Jerome (1859-1927) English writer, humorist [Jerome Klapka Jerome]
Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow, “On Vanity and Vanities” (1886)
(Source)
Quotations about:
narcissism
Note not all quotations have been tagged, so Search may find additional quotes on this topic.
I am a recovering narcissist. I thought narcissism was about self-love till someone told me there is a flip side to it. It is actually drearier than self-love; it is unrequited self-love.
Emily Levine (1944-2019) American humorist, writer, actress, speaker
“A Theory of Everything,” TED Talk, Monterey, California (Feb 2002)
(Source)
The difference between narcissism and self-love is a matter of depth. Narcissus falls in love not with the self, but with an image or reflection of the self — with the persona, the mask. The narcissist sees himself through the eyes of another, changes his lifestyle to conform with what is admired by others, tailors his behavior and expression of feelings to what will please others. Narcissism is eye trouble, voluntary blindness, an agreement to keep up appearances (hence the importance of “style”) and not to look beneath the surface.
Sam Keen (b. 1931) American author, professor, philosopher
The Passionate Life, ch. 8 (1983)
(Source)
A person in love is humble. A person who loves has, so to speak, forfeited a part of his narcissism.
Sigmund Freud (1856-1939) Austrian psychoanalyst and neurologist
“On Narcissism: An Introduction [Zur Einführung des Narzißmus],” ch. 3 (1914) [tr. Strachey]
(Source)
Alternate translations:
The lover is humble. He who loves has, so to speak, forfeited a part of his narcissism.
[tr. Baines/Riviere]
Whoever loves becomes humble. Those who love have, so to speak, pawned a part of their narcissism.
[Source]
All of nationalism can be understood as a kind of collective narcissism.
Geoff Mulgan (b. 1961) British academic, bureaucrat, policy advisor, journalist
“Because You’re Worth It,” The Guardian (12 Jun 2006)
(Source)
There’s a reason narcissists don’t learn from mistakes and that’s because they never get past the first step, which is admitting that they made one.
Robert Hogan (b. 1937) American psychologist
In Jeffrey Kluger, The Narcissist Next Door, ch. 6 (2014)
(Source)
Narcissists seem brave, they radiate charismatic energy, and they self-promote like mad. The big thing for narcissists is that they interview very well. Search committees can’t get enough of these guys.
Robert Hogan (b. 1937) American psychologist
In Jeffrey Kluger, The Narcissist Next Door, ch. 6 (2014)
(Source)
For narcissists, setbacks are not opportunities to learn; they’re problems caused by somebody else who got in their way or sabotaged their plans.
Jeffrey Kluger (b. 1954) American journalist, author
The Narcissist Next Door, ch. 1 (2014)
(Source)
You’re mighty fond o’ Craig; but for my part, I think he’s welly like a cock as think’s the sun’s rose o’ purpose to hear him crow.
George Eliot (1819-1880) English novelist [pseud. of Mary Ann Evans]
Adam Bede, ch. 17 (1859)
(Source)
Mrs. Poyser, about Mr. Craig. Sometimes paraphrased, "He was like a cock, who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow."
I knew he was done when he said “But I must be boring you” to me, which is narcissist-speak for “Now I’m bored.”
John Scalzi (b. 1969) American writer
The End of All Things (2015)
Heads of the Church have often been narcissists, flattered and thrilled by their courtiers. The court is the leprosy of the papacy.
Francis I (b. 1936) Argentinian Catholic Pope (2013- ) [b. Jorge Mario Bergoglio]
“How the Church Will Change,” interview with Eugenio Scalfari, La Repubblica (1 Oct 2013) [tr. K Wallace]
(Source)
Self-love is often rather arrogant than blind; it does not hide our faults from ourselves, but persuades us that they escape the notice of others, and disposes us to resent censures lest we should confess them to be just.
Samuel Johnson (1709-1784) English writer, lexicographer, critic
The Rambler, #155 (10 Sep 1751)
(Source)
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.
Gore Vidal (1925-2012) American novelist, dramatist, critic
“Vidal: ‘I’m at the Top of a Very Tiny Heap,'” by Michiko Kakutani, New York Times (12 Mar 1981)
