Friends are like windows through which you see out into the world and back into yourself. If you don’t have friends you see much less than you otherwise might.
Merle Shain (1935-1989) Canadian journalist and author
(Attributed)
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Many have had their greatness made for them by their enemies. Flattery is more dangerous than hatred, because it covers the stains which the other causes to be wiped out. The wise will turn ill-will into a mirror more faithful than that of kindness, and remove or improve the faults referred to.
[Fabricáronles a muchos su grandeza sus malévolos. Más fiera es la lisonja que el odio, pues remedia este eficazmente las tachas que aquella disimula. Hace el cuerdo espejo de la ojeriza, más fiel que el de la afición, y previene a la detracción los defectos, o los enmienda, que es grande el recato cuando se vive en frontera de una emulación, de una malevolencia.]
Baltasar Gracián y Morales (1601-1658) Spanish Jesuit priest, writer, philosopher
The Art of Worldly Wisdom [Oráculo Manual y Arte de Prudencia], § 84 (1647) [tr. Jacobs (1892)]
(Source)
(Source (Spanish)). Alternate translation:
Many owe their greatness to their enemies. Flattery is fiercer than hatred, for hatred corrects the faults flattery had disguised. The prudent man makes a mirror out of the evil eye of others; it is more truthful than that of affection, and helps him reduce his defects or emend them.
[tr. Maurer (1992)]
Why would we worry what others think of us if their opinions did not change us?
James Richardson (b. 1950) American poet
Vectors: Aphorisms and Ten-Second Essays, #387 (2001)
The essence of all art is to have pleasure in giving pleasure.
Mikhail Baryshnikov (b. 1948) Latvian-American dancer, choreographer, actor
“Baryshnikov: Gotta Dance,” Time (19 May 1975)
(Source)
We shape our buildings, and afterwards our buildings shape us.
Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author
Speech, House of Commons (28 Oct 1943)
(Source)
During the debate over rebuilding the House of Commons, which had been destroyed during a German bombing.
I have accustomed myself to receive with respect the opinions of others, but always take the responsibility of deciding for myself.
Andrew Jackson (1767-1845) American politician, general, US President (1829-1837)
(Attributed)
Quoted by John F. Kennedy in the foreword to T. Sorensen, Decision-Making in the White House: The Olive Branch or the Arrows (1963)
Give me the avow’d, the erect, the manly foe,
Bold I can meet — perhaps may turn his blow;
But of all plagues, good Heaven, thy wrath can send,
Save, save, oh! save me from the Candid Friend!George Canning (1770-1827) British stateman, politician, Prime Minister
“New Morality,” Anti-Jacobin (9 Jul 1798)
If evil Men speak good, or good Men evil of thee; examine thy Actions, and suspect thy self: But if evil Men speak evil of thee; hold it as an Honor, and by way of Thankfulness love them; but upon condition, that they continue to hate thee.
Thomas Fuller (1654-1734) English writer, physician
Introductio ad Prudentiam, #1253 (1725)
Every man supposes himself not to be fully understood or appreciated.
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882) American essayist, lecturer, poet
Journal (1840-05-06)
He that applauds him who does not deserve praise, is endeavoring to deceive the public; he that hisses in malice or sport, is an oppressor and a robber.
Samuel Johnson (1709-1784) English writer, lexicographer, critic
The Idler, #25 (7 Oct 1758)
(Source)
There are high spots in all of our lives and most of them have come about through encouragement from someone else. I don’t care how great, how famous, or successful a man or woman may be, each hungers for applause.
George Matthew Adams (1878-1962) American newspaper columnist, publisher
Syndicated Column (1932)
(Source)
I am strongly of opinion that an author had far better not read any reviews of his books: the unfavourable ones are almost certain to make him cross, and the favourable ones conceited; and neither of these results is desirable.
Lewis Carroll (1832-1898) English writer and mathematician [pseud. of Rev. Charles Lutwidge Dodgson]
Sylvie and Bruno (1889)
For when many rejoice together, the joy of each one is richer: they warm themselves at each other’s flame.
[Quando enim cum multis gaudetur, et in singulis uberius est gaudium, quia fervefaciunt se et inflammantur ex alterutro.]
Augustine of Hippo (354-430) Christian church father, philosopher, saint [b. Aurelius Augustinus]
Confessions, Book 8, ch. 4 / ¶ 9 (8.4.9) [tr. Sheed (1943)] (c. AD 398)
(Source)
(Source (Latin)). Alternate translations:
For when many joy together, each also has more exuberant joy for that they are kindled and inflamed one by the other.
[tr. Pusey (1838)]
For when many rejoice together, each also has more exuberant joy; for that they are kindled and inflamed one by the other.
[ed. Shedd (1860)]
For when many rejoice together, the joy of each one is the fuller in that they are incited and inflamed by one another.
[tr. Pilkington (1876)]
For when many rejoice together, in each there is an overflowing joy, for they kindle themselves and are kindled by one another.
[tr. Hutchings (1890)]
For, when joy is shared with many, the joy of each is richer, because they warm one another, catch fire from one another.
[tr. Bigg (1897)]
For when many rejoice together the joy of each one is fuller, in that they warm one another, catch fire from each other.
[tr. Outler (1955)]
For when many men rejoice together, there is a richer joy in each individual, since they enkindle themselves and they inflame one another.
[tr. Ryan (1960)]
When large numbers of people share their joy in common, the happiness of each is greater because each adds fuel to the other’s flame.
[tr. Pine-Coffin (1961)]
For when many people rejoice together, the joy of each individual is all the richer, since each one inflames the other and the warmth spreads throughout them all.
[tr. Warner (1963)]
For when joy is shared with many, joy is fuller in each. They grow ardent and are fired each by the other.
[tr. Blaiklock (1983)]
Better be a nettle in the side of your friend than his echo.
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882) American essayist, lecturer, poet
“Friendship,” Essays: First Series (1841)
A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends.
[Al varón sabio más le aprovechan sus enemigos que al necio sus amigos.]
Baltasar Gracián y Morales (1601-1658) Spanish Jesuit priest, writer, philosopher
The Art of Worldly Wisdom [Oráculo Manual y Arte de Prudencia], § 84 (1647) [tr. Jacobs (1892)]
(Source)
See also Aristophanes. (Source (Spanish)). Alternate translations:
The wise man draws more advantage from his Enemies, than the fool does from his Friends.
[Flesher ed. (1685)]
To a wise man, his enemies avail him more, than to a fool, his friends.
[tr. Fischer (1937)]
The wise person finds enemies more useful than the fool finds friends.
[tr. Maurer (1992)]
I now perceive one immense omission in my Psychology— the deepest principle of Human Nature is the craving to be appreciated, and I left it out altogether from the book, because I had never had it gratified till now.
William James (1842-1910) American psychologist and philosopher
Letter to his Philosophy 2A class at Radcliffe College (6 Apr 1896)
The class had sent him a potted azalea at Easter. Full letter:
Dear Young Ladies, I am deeply touched by your remembrance. It is the first time anyone ever treated me so kindly, so you may well believe that the impression on the heart of the lonely sufferer will be even more durable than the impression on your minds of all the teachings of Philosophy 2A. I now perceive one immense omission in my Psychology—the deepest principle of Human Nature is the craving to be appreciated, and I left it out altogether from the book, because I had never had it gratified until now. I fear that you have let lose a demon in me, and that all my actions will now be for the sake of such rewards.
