Then [President Coolidge] said he wished I had the time to go up into Canada and see what kind of deal I could make in the way of annexation, that Canada was just about on the verge of seeing the advantage of having a working connection with some live growing concern. […]
Now from what I can see, there don’t seem to be any demand in Canada to join in with us and be murdered or run over with us. They strike me as entirely too sane a nation to fit in our scheme of things down home. Why, you can still buy a drink without having to take a whole case, and can believe in Evolution. You can do both of these things and not be considered an Atheist up here.
They have the queerest ideas of what is right and wrong that way. Now I have no idea but what we could take them over and make a paying proposition out of them, for the country now is supplying about everything we use in the way of raw materials. But I hate to interrupt a friendship that has been going on now pretty steady since the battle of Lake Erie. You see they don’t owe us and they still think we are pretty good neighbors, so if we can just keep from annexing them, and keep from loaning them anything in the way of a government debt, why we ought to be friends for years to come. […]
What we need is some good country to annex us.

Will Rogers (1879-1935) American humorist

Column (1926-10-17), “Weekly Article: Will Rogers Back in U. S. Wants To Hear About Your Vote” [No. 201]
    (Source)

Shorter versions of this are given in Bryan Sterling (ed.), Will Rogers Speaks (2023):