DEAR MISS MANNERS: When does a gentleman offer his arm to a lady as they are walking down the street together?
GENTLE READER: Strictly speaking, only when he can be practical assistance to her. That is, when the way is steep, dark, crowded, or puddle-y. However, it is rather a cozy juxtaposition, less compromising than walking hand in hand, and rather enjoyable for people who are fond of each other, so Miss Manners allows some leeway in interpreting what is of practical assistance. One wouldn’t want a lady to feel unloved walking down the street, any more than one would want her to fall of the curb.
Quotations about:
gallantry
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Act like the person you are, not the way they make you act.
[Cada uno ha de obrar como quien es, no como le obligan.]
Baltasar Gracián y Morales (1601-1658) Spanish Jesuit priest, writer, philosopher
The Art of Worldly Wisdom [Oráculo Manual y Arte de Prudencia], § 165 (1647) [tr. Maurer (1992)]
(Source)
On waging war honorably. (Source (Spanish)). Alternate translation:All men ought to act according to what they themselves are, and not to what others are.
[Flesher ed. (1685)]Every one must needs act as he is, not as others would make him to be.
[tr. Jacobs (1892)]Each must act for what he is, and not for what he is held.
[tr. Fischer (1937)]
They continued to mount the winding staircase. A high wind, blowing through the loopholes, went rushing up the shaft, and filled the girl’s skirts like a balloon, so that she was ashamed, until he took the hem of her dress and held it down for her. He did it perfectly simply, as he would have picked up her glove. She remembered this always.
David Herbert "D. H." Lawrence (1885-1930) English novelist
Sons and Lovers, Part 2, ch. 7 “Lad-and-Girl Love” (1913)
(Source)
