Q. Is it ever acceptable to be rude?
A. No. Now, that doesn’t mean you have to let people walk all over you. Etiquette does not render you defenseless. If it did; even I wouldn’t subscribe to it. But rudeness in retaliation for rudeness just doubles the amount of rudeness in the world.
Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist, etiquette expert [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Interview (2011-08), “Q and A with Miss Manners,” by Arcynta Ali Childs, Smithsonian magazine
(Source)
Quotations about:
retaliation
Note not all quotations have been tagged, so Search may find additional quotes on this topic.
Injure a businessman and he’ll try to make you sorry; injure an artist and he’ll try to make you immortal.
Mignon McLaughlin (1913-1983) American journalist and author
The Neurotic’s Notebook, ch. 7 (1963)
(Source)
If people were always kind and obedient to those who are cruel and unjust; the wicked people would have it all their own way: they would never feel afraid, and so they would never alter, but would grow worse and worse. When we are struck at without a reason, we should strike back again very hard; I am sure we should — so hard as to teach the person who struck us never to do it again.
Charlotte Brontë (1816-1855) British novelist [pseud. Currer Bell]
Jane Eyre, ch. 6 [Jane] (1847)
(Source)
A man’s character is most evident by how he treats those who are not in a position either to retaliate or reciprocate.
Paul Eldridge (1888-1982) American educator, novelist, poet
“Lanterns in the Night,” Maxim 41, The Jewish Forum (Aug 1948)
Restated by Eldridge in Maxims for a Modern Man, #1198 (1965): "A man is most accurately judged by how he treats those who are not in a position either to retaliate or to reciprocate."
The same sentiment is also made or attributed to Ann Landers, Abigail Van Buren, Malcolm Forbes, James Miles, and (without any reference found) Goethe and Samuel Johnson. A more convoluted version can be found in the 19th Century by Charles Spurgeon.
More examination of this quotation:
We are more apt to persecute the unfortunates than the scoundrels; the scoundrels may retaliate.
Paul Eldridge (1888-1982) American educator, novelist, poet
Maxims for a Modern Man, #952 (1965)
(Source)
But he that touches me, (hands off! I cry, —
Avaunt, and at your peril come not nigh!)
Shall for his pains be chaunted up and down,
The jest and byeword of a chuckling Town.[At ille,
Qui me conmorit (melius non tangere, clamo),
Fiebit et insignis tota cantabitur urbe.]Horace (65–8 BC) Roman poet, satirist, soldier, politician [Quintus Horatius Flaccus]
Satires [Saturae, Sermones], Book 2, # 1, “Sunt quibus in Satira,” l. 44ff (2.2.44-46) (30 BC) [tr. Howes (1845)]
(Source)
On the dangers of antagonizing a satirist.
(Source (Latin)). Alternate translations:[...] that none woulde worke me wo.
But worke they doo, but who so does, though he be divelyshe fell,
I blason farre and nere his armes, and wanton touches tell.
He may go howle, and pule for wo, the citizens will scorn hym,
And cause him wyshe full many a tyme, his damme had never borne hym.
[tr. Drant (1567)]And none bereave
The peace I seek. But if there do, believe
Me they will rew't, when with my keen Stile stung,
Through the whole town they shall in pomp be sung.
[tr. Fanshawe; ed. Brome (1666)]Let none hurt Peaceful Me with envious Tongue,
For if he does, He shall repent the wrong:
The warning's fair, his Vices shall be shown,
And Life expos'd to all the Cens'ring Town.
[tr. Creech (1684)]But who provokes me, or attacks my fame,
"Better not touch me, friend," I loud exclaim,
His eyes shall weep the folly of his tongue.
By laughing crowds in rueful ballad sung.
[tr. Francis (1747)]But that man who shall provoke me (I give notice, that it is better not to touch me) shall weep [his folly], and as a notorious character shall be sung through all the streets of Rome.
[tr. Smart/Buckley (1853)]But he who shall have once provoked me -- 'twill be better that he touch me not, I cry -- shall rue it, and, become notorious, shall be the theme of jest, through all the town.
[tr. Millington (1870)]But should one seek
To quarrel with me, you shall hear him shriek:
Don't say I gave no warning: up and down
He shall be trolled and chorused through the town.
[tr. Conington (1874)]But if one stir me up ("Better not touch me!" I shout), he shall smart for it and have his name sung up and down the town.
[tr. Fairclough (Loeb) (1926)]But the man who provokes me will weep (HANDS OFF! I WARN YOU)
and his name will be widely rehearsed all over town.
[tr. Palmer Bovie (1959)]But any guy
who gives me any trouble (my motto is “Hands off!”)
will become a tearful celebrity, sung about all over town.
[tr. Fuchs (1977)]But attack -- it’s better not to, believe me -- and live
To regret it, your name paraded all over Rome!
[tr. Raffel (1983)]But he who attacks me (O I warn you!
keep your hands to yourself!)
will have cause enough for weeping.
He will be pointed out and ridiculed
by everyone in Rome.
[tr. Alexander (1999)]"Hands off" is my motto:
anybody who gives me any trouble, he'll be
swiftly famous for his pain and snuffling.
[tr. Matthews (2002)]But whoever stirs me up (better keep your distance, I’m telling you!)
will be sorry; he’ll become a thing of derision throughout the city.
[tr. Rudd (2005 ed.)]But he
Who provokes me (better not touch, I cry!) will suffer,
And his blemishes will be sung throughout the City.
[tr. Kline (2015)]
