Quotations by Martin, Judith


Treat your employees as if they were writing a book about you.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
“Miss Manners,” syndicated column (17 Aug 2003)
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Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 23-Mar-17
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Miss Manners’ meager arsenal consists only of the withering look, the insistent and repeated request, the cold voice, the report up the chain of command, and the tilted nose. Also the ability to dismiss inferior behavior from her mind as coming from inferior people. You will perhaps point out that she will never know the joy of delivering a well-deserved sock in the chops. True — but she will never inspire one either.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
“Miss Manners,” syndicated column (18 May 1980)
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Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 23-Mar-17
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Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other, so we can have some conversation.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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Allowing an unimportant mistake to pass without comment is a wonderful social grace.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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We are all born charming, fresh and spontaneous and must be civilized before we are fit to participate in society.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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If you can’t be kind, at least be vague.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
(Attributed)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.

Martin - good qualities - wist_info quote

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
(Attributed)
Added on 6-Jan-16 | Last updated 20-Jan-19
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Ideological differences are no excuse for rudeness.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Miss Manner’s Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior (1982)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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Indeed, Miss Manners has come to believe that the basic political division in this country is not between liberals and conservatives but between those who believe that they should have a say in the love lives of strangers and those who do not.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Miss Manners Rescues Civilization
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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When Miss Manners observes people behaving rudely, she never steps in to correct them. She behaves politely to them, and then goes home and snickers about them afterward. That is what the well-bred person does.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior (1982)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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The proper use of embarrassment is as a conscience of manners. As your conscience might trouble you if you do anything immoral, your sense of embarrassment should be activated if you do anything unmannerly. As conscience should come from within, so should embarrassment. Hot tingles and flushes are quite proper when they arise from your own sense of having violated your own standards, inadvertently or advertently, but Miss Manners hereby absolves everyone from feeling any embarrassment deliberately imposed by others.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior (1982)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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DEAR MISS MANNERS:
Can you tell me a tactful way of letting a friend know that she is getting too fat?
GENTLE READER:
Can you tell Miss Manners a tactful reason for wanting to do so?

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior (1982)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection IS the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior (1982)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 1-Feb-04
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The invention of the teenager was a mistake, in Miss Manners’ opinion. […] Once you identify a period of life in which people have few restrictions and, at the same time, few responsibilities — they get to stay out late but don’t have to pay taxes — naturally nobody wants to live any other way.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior (1982)
Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 16-Apr-10
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