Smiles are contagious; so are tears; to see
Another sobbing, brings a sob from me.
No, no, good Peleus; set the example, pray,
And weep yourself; then weep perhaps I may.[Ut ridentibus adrident, ita flentibus adflent
humani voltus. Si vis me flere, dolendum est
primum ipsi tibi: tum tua me infortunia laedent,
Telephe vel Peleu.]Horace (65–8 BC) Roman poet, satirist, soldier, politician [Quintus Horatius Flaccus]
Epistles [Epistularum, Letters], Book 2, ep. 3 “Art of Poetry [Ars Poetica; To the Pisos],” l. 101ff (2.3.101-103) (19 BC) [tr. Conington (1874)]
(Source)
Telephus and Peleus were mythic figures in well-known Greek tragedies. The advice is offered up to those who write of or act/declaim the roles of such characters.
(Source (Latin)). Other translations:The cheares of men as these will smerke on those that use to smyle:
So are theye wrinchd, when theye do weepe and chaungd within a whyle.
If thou wouldste have me weepe for the firste muste thou pensyfe be.
Thy harmes shall hitte me, when I spy that they have harmed thee.
[tr. Drant (1567)]To worke the hearers minds, still to the plight.
Mens count'nances, with such as laugh, are prone
To laughter: so they grieve with those that mone:
If thou wouldst have mee weep, bee thou first dround
Thy selfe in tears, then me thy harms will wound,
[tr. Jonson (1640); l. 145ff]We Weep and Laugh as we see others doe,
He only makes me sad who shews the way,
And first is sad himself, then (Telephus)
I feel the weight of your Calamities,
And fancy all your miseries my Own.
[tr. Roscommon (1680)]With them, who laugh, our social joy appears;
With them, who mourn, we sympathise in tears;
If you would have me weep, begin the strain,
Then I shall feel your sorrows, feel your pain.
[tr. Francis (1747)]With those that smile, our face in smiles appears;
With those that weep, our cheeks are bath'd in tears:
To make me grieve, be first your anguish shown,
And I shall feel your sorrows like my own.
[tr. Coleman (1783)]From face to face as smiles contagious creep,
so weeps the according eye with those that weep.
Who claims my tears, must first display his own;
Then shall I catch his pangs and share his moan.
[tr. Howes (1845)]As the human countenance smiles on those that smile, so does it sympathize with those that weep. If you would have me weep you must first express the passion of grief yourself; then, Telephus or Peleus, your misfortunes hurt me.
[tr. Smart/Buckley (1853)]A face all smiles makes other faces smile,
A face all tears will tears from others wile.
Unless, then, in your voice a sob I hear,
You will not wring from me a single tear.
[tr. Martin (1881)]As human countenances laugh with those who laugh so they weep with those who weep. If you desire me to weep, O Telephus or Peleus, yourself must first lead the way; then you thrill through me.
[tr. Elgood (1893)]As men's faces smile on those who smile, so they respond to those who weep. If you would have me weep, you must first feel grief yourself: then, O Telephus or Peleus, will your misfortunes hurt me.
[tr. Fairclough (Loeb) (1926)]As the human face answers a smile with a smile, so does it wait upon tears; if you would have me weep, you must first of all feel grief yourself; then and not till then will your misfortunes, Telephus or Peleus, touch me.
[tr. Blakeney; ed. Kramer, Jr. (1936)]A man’s face is wreathed in smiles when he sees someone smile;
It twists when he sees someone cry; if you expect me
To burst into tears, you have to feel sorrow yourself.
Then your woes will fasten on me, O Telephus, Peleus.
[tr. Palmer Bovie (1959)]Just as laughter inspires laughter, tears bring tears
to human faces; if you want my tears, you first must
weep yourself. Then your agonies will hurt me too.
[tr. Fuchs (1977)]We smile when we see smiling, weep at tears:
Ask me to sob
when you can sob
yourself --
Then (ah) tragic heroes are tragic
(To me).
[tr. Raffel (1983 ed.)]Men smile if the language smiles;
They weep if the language truly weeps. If you
Desire to hear me weep, you must truly grieve,
O Peleus or Telephus, and I
Grieve as if I suffered your cause of grief.
[tr. Ferry (2001)]When a person smiles, people's faces smile in return;
when he weeps, they show concern. Before you can move me to tears,
you must grieve yourself. Only then will your woes distress me.
[tr. Rudd (2005 ed.)]As the human face smiles at a smile, so it echoes
Those who weep: if you want to move me to tears
You must first grieve yourself: then Peleus or Telephus
Your troubles might pain me.
[tr. Kline (2015)]
Quotations about:
weeping
Note not all quotations have been tagged, so Search may find additional quotes on this topic.
And what are you that, missing you,
I should be kept awake
As many nights as there are days
With weeping for your sake?Edna St. Vincent Millay (1892-1950) American poet
Poem (1921-10-31), “The Philosopher,” st. 1, Ainslee’s Magazine, Vol. 48, No. 3
(Source)
First collected in A Few Figs from Thistles (1922).
Assist the afflicted with something real, if thou canst: As for Tears they are but Water, what good can they do?
Thomas Fuller (1654-1734) English physician, preacher, aphorist, writer
Introductio ad Prudentiam, Vol. 2, # 2023 (1727)
(Source)
What is the reason that we laugh so freely in a theatre but are ashamed to weep? Is it less natural to be melted by what excites pity than to burst into laughter at what is comical? […] It is not thought odd to hear a whole theatre ring with laughter at some passage of a comedy, but, on the contrary, it implies that it was funny, and very naturally performed; therefore the extreme restraint every one puts on himself not to shed tears and the affected laughter with which one tries to disguise them, clearly prove that the natural result of lofty tragedy should be to make us all weep without concealment and publicly, and without any other hindrance than wiping our eyes.
[D’où vient que l’on rit si librement au théâtre, et que l’on a honte d’y pleurer? Est-il moins dans la nature de s’attendrir sur le pitoyable que d’éclater sur le ridicule? […] Comme donc ce n’est point une chose bizarre d’entendre s’élever de tout un amphithéâtre un ris universel sur quelque endroit d’une comédie, et que cela suppose au contraire qu’il est plaisant et très naïvement exécuté, aussi l’extrême violence que chacun se fait à contraindre ses larmes, et le mauvais ris dont on veut les couvrir prouvent clairement que l’effet naturel du grand tragique serait de pleurer tous franchement et de concert à la vue l’un de l’autre, et sans autre embarras que d’essuyer ses larmes, outre qu’après être convenu de s’y abandonner.]
Jean de La Bruyère (1645-1696) French essayist, moralist
The Characters [Les Caractères], ch. 1 “Of Works of the Mind [Des Ouvrages de l’Esprit],” § 50 (1.50) (1688) [tr. Van Laun (1885)]
(Source)
(Source (French)). Alternate translations:What's the reason that we laugh so freely, and are asham'd to weep at the Theatre? Is Nature less subjects to be soften'd by pity, than to burst forth at what is Comical? [...] We must suppose 'tis the natural effect of a good Tragedy, to make us Weep freely in sight of the whole Audience, without any other trouble than drying our Eyes, and wiping our Faces. It being no more ridiculous to be seen Weeping, than to be heard to Laugh by the whole Theatre: On the contrary, we then conclude there was something acted very pleasantly, and to the life; and the restraint a man puts on him∣self to hide his tears, by an affected Grimace, plainly demonstrates that he ought not to resist the main design of a Tragedy, but give way to his Passions, and discover em as openly, and with as much confidence, as at a Comedy.
[Bullord ed. (1696)]What is the reason we laugh so freely, but are asham'd to weep at the Theatre? Is Nature less subject to be soften'd by Pity, than to burst out into Laughter at what is Comical? [...] As therefore 'tis thought no odd thing to hear the whole Amphitheatre ring with an Universal Laughter, at some passage of a Comedy; butr on the contrary, implies something was pleasantly said, and naturally perform';d; so the extreme violence which every one offers to himself in constraining his Tears, and disguising ;em with affected Grimaces, clealry prove that the Natural Effect of good Tragedy is to make us weep with all freedom, and in concert, in another's sight, and wihtout any other disturbance than wiping our Eyes.
[Curll ed. (1713)]Why is it that we laugh so freely at the theatre and yet are ashamed to weep there? Is it less natural to be moved by what is pitiful than to be amused by what is ridiculous? [...] Since then it is no unusual thing to hear a whole theatre break into unanimous laughter at some passage in a comedy, since this implies, on the contrary, that it is amusing and extremely life-like, so the extreme violence we do to our feelings by restraining our tears, and the false laughter with which we try to conceal them, clearly proves that the natural effect of great tragedy should be to make us all weep quite openly, with one accord, in one another’s presence, with no further concern than to wipe our eyes.
[tr. Stewart (1970), "Of Books"]
Surely I wept, leaning upon a ledge
Of the rough rock, so that my escort said,
“Art thou then weak and foolish like the rest?
Here lives true piety when pity dies.
But who more wicked than the man who yields
To sorrow place where judgment is divine!”[Certo io piangea, poggiato a un de’ rocchi
del duro scoglio, sì che la mia scorta
mi disse: “Ancor se’ tu de li altri sciocchi?
Qui vive la pietà quand’è ben morta;
chi è più scellerato che colui
che al giudicio divin passion comporta?]Dante Alighieri (1265-1321) Italian poet
The Divine Comedy [Divina Commedia], Book 1 “Inferno,” Canto 20, l. 25ff (20.25-30) (1309) [tr. Johnston (1867)]
(Source)
Virgil chides Dante for weeping over the fate of the damned in the third circle, fourth bolgia, who themselves are also weeping.
Maybe. There are a lot of scholarly debates over some of the wording and pronoun references here. Some translators play off the word pietà meaning both "pity" and "piety" in Italian. It's also possible that, rather than the final lines condemning Dante for letting his compassion defy an acceptance of God's judgment, they refer to the sinful arrogance of fortune-tellers (the group being punished here) in believing they can question or change God's decrees for the future.
(Source (Italian)). Alternate translations:Leaning against the rock, I so great grief
Express'd, that thus my Guide to me apply'd;
Are you among the weak to be arrang'd?
When without life, 'tis here Compassion lives.
Who can more wicked be estem'd than He
Who thinks that the divine Decrees are wrong.
[tr. Rogers (1782), l. 22ff]Their laboring reins the falling tear bedew'd,
Deep struck with sympathetic woe I stood,
'Till thus the Bard my slumb'ring reason woke: --
"Dar'st thou the sentence of thy God arraign;
Or with presumptuous tears his doom profane?
Say, can thy tears his righteous doom revoke?
[tr. Boyd (1802), st. 5]Against a rock
I leant and wept, so that my guide exclaim’d:
“What, and art thou too witless as the rest?
Here pity most doth show herself alive,
When she is dead. What guilt exceedeth his,
Who with Heaven’s judgment in his passion strives?
[tr. Cary (1814)]Certes I wept so, leaning toward a breast
Of that hard shelf, mine escort chiding said:
"Why wilt thou yet be foolish as the rest?
Here pity best hath life when wholly dead:
What guiltier wretch than he whose grief avowed
Impugns Almighty Judgment?
[tr. Dayman (1843)]Certainly I wept, leaning on one of the rocks of the hard cliff, so that my Escort said to me: "Art thou, too, like the other fools?
"Here pity lives when it is altogether dead. Who more impious than he that sorrows at God's judgment?"
[tr. Carlyle (1849)]Sore I lamented, leaning on a rock,
A rough-planed crag, until my guide addressed
The words -- "Are you, too, foolish like the rest?
Here Pity is alive, e'en when quite dead.
And what can be more wicked than the man
Who 'gainst heaven's justice in his passion ran.
[tr. Bannerman (1850)]Truly I wept, leaning upon a peak
Of the hard crag, so that my Escort said
To me: "Art thou, too, of the other fools?
Here pity lives when it is wholly dead;
Who is a greater reprobate than he
Who feels compassion at the doom divine?
[tr. Longfellow (1867)]Of a truth I began to weep leaning against one of the rocks of the hard cliff, so that my Escort said to me: "Art thou yet among the other foolish ones? Here pity lives when it is right dead. Who is more wicked than he who brings passion to the judgement of God?"
[tr. Butler (1885)]Surely I wept, supported on a rise
Of that fire-hardened rock, so that my guide
Said to me: "Thou too 'mongst the little wise?
Here Pity lives alone, when it hath died.
Who is the greater scelerate than he
Who lets his passion 'gainst God's judgment bide?"
[tr. Minchin (1885)]Truly I wept, leaning on one of the rocks of the hard crag, so that my Guide said to me, “Art thou also one of the fools? Here pity liveth when it is quite dead. Who is more wicked than he who feels compassion at the Divine Judgment?"
[tr. Norton (1892)]I wept indeed, leaning against a rock on the stony ridge, so overcome, that my Guide said to me: "Art thou too like the other fools? Here pity liveth but when it is truly dead. Who is more lost to righteousness than he whose pity is awakened at the decree of God?"
[tr. Sullivan (1893)]Certain, I wept, supported on a comer
Of the hard spur, so freely that my escort
Said to me : "Art thou still among the simple?
Here piety lives when wholly dead is pity.
Who is than he more desperately wicked
Who to the doom divine doth bring compassion?
[tr. Griffith (1908)]I wept indeed, leaning on one of the rocks of the rugged ridge, so that my Escort said to me: "Art thou too as witless as the rest? Here pity lives when it is quite dead. Who is more guilty than he that makes the divine counsel subject to his will?"
[tr. Sinclair (1939)]Truly I wept, leant up against the breast
Of the hard granite, so that my Guide said:
"Art thou then still so foolish, like the rest?
Here pity lives when it is rightly dead.
What more impiety can he avow
Whose heart rebelleth at God's judgment dread?
[tr. Binyon (1943)]Truly I wept, leaned on the pinnacles
Of the hard rock; until my guide said, "Why!
And art thou too like all the other fools?
Here pity, or here piety, must die
If the other lives; who's wickeder than one
That's agonized by God's high equity?"
[tr. Sayers (1949)]Certainly,
I wept. I leaned agianst the jagged face
of a rock and wept so that my Guide said: "Still?
Still like the other fools? There is no place
for pity here. Who is more arrogant
within his soul, who is more impious
than one who dares to sorrow at God's judgment?
[tr. Ciardi (1954)]Truly I wept, leaning on one of the rocks of the hard crag, so that my guide said to me, “Are you even yet among the other fools? Here pity lives when it is altogether dead. Who is more impious than he who sorrows at God’s judgment?"
[tr. Singleton (1970)]Indeed I did weep, as I leaned my body
against a jut of rugged rock. My guide:
"So you are still like all the other fools?
In this place piety lives when pity is dead,
for who could be more wicked than that man
who tries to bend divine will to his own!
[tr. Musa (1971)]Of course I wept, leaning against a rock
along that rugged ridge, so that my guide
told me: “Are you as foolish as the rest?
Here pity only lives when it is dead:
for who can be more impious than he
who links God's judgment to passivity?
[tr. Mandelbaum (1980)]I certainly wept, supported on one of the rocks
Of the projecting stone, so that my escort
Said to me: "Are you too like the other fools?
Here pity is alive when it is dead:
Who is more criminal than he who suffers
Because he does not like the divine judgement?
[tr. Sisson (1981)]Truly I wept,
Leaning on an outcrop of that rocky site,
And my master spoke to me: "Do you suppose
You are above with the other fools even yet?
Here, pity lives when it is dead to these.
Who could be more impious than one who'd dare
To sorrow at the judgment God decrees?"
[tr. Pinsky (1994)]Surely I wept, leaning on one of the rocks of the hard ridge, so that my guide said to me: “Are you still one of the other fools?
Here pity lives when it is quite dead: who is more wicked than one who brings passion to God’s judgment?"
[tr. Durling (1996)]Truly, I wept, leaning against one of the rocks of the solid cliff, so that my guide said to me: "Are you like other fools, as well? Pity is alive here, where it is best forgotten. Who is more impious than one who bears compassion for God’s judgement?"
[tr. Kline (2002)]Of this, be sure: that, leaning on a spur
of that unyielding cliff, I wept. "Are you,"
my escort said, "like them, an idiot still?
Here pity lives where pity's truth is dead.
Who is more impious, more scarred with sin
than one who pleads compassion at God's throne?"
[tr. Kirkpatrick (2006)]Yes, I wept, leaning against a spur
of the rough crag, so that my escort said:
"Are you still witless as the rest?
Here piety lives when pity is quite dead.
Who is more impious than one who thinks
that God shows passion in His judgment?"
[tr. Hollander/Hollander (2007)]O yes, I wept, leaning for support on one
Of the solid rocks in the reef, making my guide
Say this: "You're still one of the stupid ones?
Down here, the only living pity is dead.
Is anyone more wicked than the man
Regretting the righteous judgment decreed by God?"
[tr. Raffel (2010)]I wept indeed, held up in my surprise
By one rock of the ridge. My Escort said:
"You're witless as the rest? Here pity dwells,
But only when it's absolutely dead.
Who is more guilty than he who by spells
And mysteries makes it seem as if divine
Judgment were subject to his will?"
[tr. James (2013)]
She weeps not for her sire if none be near,
In company she calls up many a tear.
True mourners would not have their sorrows known,
For grief of heart will choose to weep alone.[Amissum non flet cum sola est Gellia patrem,
Si quis adest, iussae prosiliunt lacrimae.
Non luget quisquis laudari, Gellia, quaerit,
Ille dolet vere, qui sine teste dolet.]Martial (AD c.39-c.103) Spanish Roman poet, satirist, epigrammatist [Marcus Valerius Martialis]
Epigrams [Epigrammata], Book 1, epigram 33 (1.33) (AD 85-86) [tr. Pott & Wright (1921)]
(Source)
"On Gellia." (Source (Latin)). Alternate translations:Gellia ne'er mourns her father's loss,
When no one's by to see,
but yet her soon commanded tears
Flow in society:
To weep for praise is but a feigned moan;
He grieves most truly, that does grieve alone.
[tr. Fletcher (1656)]When all alone, your tears withstand;
In company, can floods command.
Who mourns for fashion, bids us mark;
Who mourns indeed, mourns in the dark.
[tr. Killigrew (1695)]Gellia alone, alas! can never weep,
Though her fond father perish'd in the deep;
With company the tempest all appears
And beauteous Gellia's e'en dissolved in tears.
Through public grief though Gellia aims at praise,
'Tis private sorrow which must merit raise.
[Gentleman's Magazine (1736)]Her father dead! -- Alone no grief she knows;
Th' obedient tear at every visit flows.
No mourner he, who must with praise be fee'd!
But he, who mourns in secret, mourns indeed.
[tr. Hay (1755), 1.34]Sire-reft, alone, poor Gellia weeps no woe:
In company she bids the torrent flow.
they cannot grieve, who to be seen, can cry:
Theirs is the grief, who without witness sigh.
[tr. Elphinston (1782), Book 6, Part 3, ep. 1]Gellia, when she is alone, does not lament the loss of her father. If any one be present, her bidden tears gush forth. A person does not grieve who seeks for praise; his is real sorrow who grieves without a witness.
[tr. Amos (1858), #95 "Feigned Tears"]Gellia does not mourn for her deceased father, when she is alone; but if any one is present, obedient tears spring forth. He mourns not, Gellia, who seeks to be praised; he is the true mourner, who mourns without a witness.
[tr. Bohn's Classical (1859)]He grieves not much who grieves to merit praise;
His grief is real who grieves in solitude.
[ed. Harbottle (1897)]Gellia weeps not while she is alone for her lost father; is any one be present, her tears leap forth at her bidding. He does not lament who looks, Gellia for praise;' he truly sorrows who sorrows unseen.
[tr. Ker (1919)]Gellia, alone, ne'er weeps her sire at all;
In company the bidden tears down fall.
True grief is not for admiration shown.
He only weeps indeed, who weeps alone.
[tr. Francis & Tatum (1924), #18, 1.32]When alone, Gellia never cries for the father she lost.
If someone is with her, tears well up in her eyes,
as if ordered to fall in. If some one looks for praise,
he is not in mourning, Gellia.
He truly mourns
who mourns
alone.
[tr. Bovie (1970)]In private she mourns not the late-lamented;
If someone's by her tears leap forth on call.
Sorry, my dear, is not so easily rented.
They are true tears that without witness fall.
[tr. Cunningham (1971)]Gellia does not cry for her lost father when she's by herself, but if she has company, out spring the tears to order. Gellia, whoever seeks credit for mourning is no mourner. He truly grieves who grieves without witnesses.
[tr. Shackleton Bailey (1993)]Gellia's mourning for her father?
If by herself she doesn't bother.
But when she sees that company lurks
She opens up the waterworks.
She just wants praise for grief that's shown;
They truly grieve who weep alone.
[tr. Ericsson (1995)]When Janet is sequestered, out of view,
Then never for her father's death she cries.
But let some viewers come, just one or two,
Then tears dramatically flood her eyes.
We know from this how sad in fact she's been:
It is not grief that's only grieved when seen.
[tr. Wills (2007)]Gellia doesn't weep for her dead father
when she's alone, but tears pour on command
if someone comes. Who courts praise isn't mourning --
he truly grieves who grieves with none at hand.
[tr. McLean (2014)]Alone, Gellia never weeps over her father's death;
if someone's there, her tears burst forth at will.
Mourning that looks for praise, Gellia, is not grief:
true sorrow grieves unseen.
[tr. Powell]
Cry with me;
for sharing tears with others is relief in hardship.[συνάλγησον, ὡς ὁ κάμνων
δακρύων μεταδοὺς ἔχει
χουφότητα μόχϑων.]Euripides (485?-406? BC) Greek tragic dramatist
Andromeda [Ανδρομέδα], frag. 119 (TGF) (412 BC)
(Source)
Nauck frag. 119, Barnes frag. 51, Musgrave frag. 22. (Source (Greek)). Alternate translation.Come, let us weep together; for the unhappy
Find social tears their poignant griefs assuage.
[tr. Wodhull (1809)]
Sorrow preys upon
Its solitude, and nothing diverts it
From its sad visions of the other world
Than calling it at moments back to this.
The busy have no time for tears.George Gordon, Lord Byron (1788-1824) English poet
The Two Foscari, Act 4, sc. 1 [Loredano] (1821)
(Source)
Laugh and the world laughs with you,
Weep and you weep alone;
For the sad old earth must borrow its mirth,
But has trouble enough of its own.Ella Wheeler Wilcox (1850-1919) American author, poet, temperance advocate, spiritualist
Poem (1883-02-25), “Solitude,” ll. 1-4, New York Sun
(Source)
Possibly the most famous of Wilcox' works, these are the first four lines (the only ones anyone remembers) of three eight-line stanzas. Wilcox was paid $5 by the Sun.
Wilcox' original title was "The Way of the World," but the Sun editor changed it to "Solitude." She kept that new title when it was collected into Poems of Passion (1883).
And if I laugh at any mortal thing,
‘Tis that I may not weep.