Then let no woman hence in man believe,
Or think a lover speaks but to deceive.
He, while ungratified desire is high,
Shrinks from no oath, no promise will deny;
Soon as his lust is satiate with its prize,
He spurns his vows and perjury’s curse defies.
[Nunc iam nulla viro iuranti femina credat,
nulla viri speret sermones esse fideles;
quis dum aliquid cupiens animus praegestit apisci,
nil metuunt iurare, nihil promittere parcunt:
sed simul ac cupidae mentis satiata libido est,
dicta nihil metuere, nihil periuria curant.]Catullus (c. 84 BC – c. 54 BC) Latin poet [Gaius Valerius Catullus]
Carmina # 64 “The Nuptuals of Peleus and Thetis,” ll. 144-149 [tr. Lamb (1821)]
(Source)
Ariadne lamenting Theseus' faithlessness.
(Source (Latin)). Alternate translations:Hear this, and wisdom learn, ye witless fair!
Ne'er let false man with empty oaths deceive,
No protestations of the sex believe!
Is there a wish their ardent souls would gain;
they swear, they promise, and at length obtain;
The wish obtain'd, they fearless break their word,
Nor plighted faith, nor solemn vows regard.
[tr. Nott (1795), # 61; ll. 173ff.]Henceforth let woman; never trust the oaths that man shall make,
Nor ever more his honeyed speech within her bosom take!
While yet the fire of his desire is hot within his breast,
What will he not to woman swear, to heav'n what not protest?
But let her in an evil hour resign her maiden trust,
And yield the blossom of her youth to sate his selfish lust,
Then what recks he of lavish oath, or vow, or whisper'd pray'r?
He triumphs in his perjuries, and spurns at her despair.
[tr. T. Martin (1861)]Henceforth let never woman trust an oath than man shall swear,
Nor count the tender speeches true his lying lips declare:
For when with lusting soul he yearns some object to enjoy,
No oath, no promise then he deems too sacred to employ;
But when his soul is sated, and his burning passion dies,
He fears to break no plighted vows, cares nought for perjuries.
[tr. Cranstoun (1867)]Let not a woman trust, since that first treason, a lover's
Desperate oath, none hope true lover's promise is earnest.
They, while fondly to win their amorous humour essayeth,
Fear no covetous oath, all false free promises heed not;
They if once lewd pleasure attain unruly possession,
Lo they fear not promise, of oath or perjury reck not.
[tr. Ellis (1871)]Now, let woman no more trust her to man when he sweareth,
Ne'er let her hope to find or truth or faith in his pleadings,
Who when lustful thought forelooks to somewhat attaining,
Never an oath they fear, shall spare no promise to promise.
Yet no sooner they sate all lewdness and lecherous fancy,
Nothing remember of words and reck they naught of fore-swearing.
[tr. Burton (1893)]Now, now, let no woman give credence to man's oath, let none hope for faithful vows from mankind; for while their eager desire strives for its end, nothing fear they to swear, nothing of promises forbear they: but instantly their lusting thoughts are satiate with lewdness, nothing of speech they remember, nothing of perjuries care.
[tr. Smithers (1894)]Henceforth let no woman believe a man's oath, let none believe that a man's speeches can be trustworthy. They, while their mind desires something and longs eagerly to gain it, nothing fear to swear, nothing spare to promise; but as soon as the lust of their greedy mind is satisfied, they fear not then their words, they heed not their perjuries.
[tr. Warre Cornish (1904)]Hereafter let; no woman trust man's promises, or hope for faithful words; for when they wish to attain their desires, there is nothing they will not swear, no promise do they scruple to make: but once their desires have been satisfied, they fear no broken words and care nothing for their perjuries.
[tr. Stuttaford (1912)]Never let maid believe a lover's oath;
Nor hope a man be faithful to his troth;
Long as men's hearts are spurred by keen desire,
No oath they shrink from and no promise spare;
Soon as their sated lust begins to tire
No oath they heed and nought for falsehood care.
[tr. Symons-Jeune (1923)]Henceforth, no woman trust the oath of man,
No woman dream the word of man is true:
They, whensoe'er they lust for anything,
Swear every oath and every promise make,
But, when their eager lust is satisfied,
Nor reck of oaths nor promises regard.
[tr. MacNaghten (1925)]Henceforth let never listening maid believe
Protesting man! When their false hearts conceive
The selfish wish, to all but pleasure blind,
No words they spare, no oaths unuttered leave.
But when possession cloys their pampered mind,
No care have they for oaths, no words their honour bind.
[tr. Wright (1926)]From this hour
may no woman believe what men say, for men (minds set upon a single end) will promise everything,
but once the shrewd mind satisfies its passion, it plunges forward (the broken promise merely words that trail behind tall bravery).
[tr. Gregory (1931)]Let no woman ever believe any oath that a man swears,
or ever expect him to keep faith with his fine speeches!
When they want something, when they are anxious to get it,
they take oaths without fear, and pour out promises freely;
but just as soon as their hot desire is sated,
none of their lies & deceptions ever disturb them.
[tr. C. Martin (1979)]From now on let no woman believe a man's sworn promises.
From now on let no woman hope a man's talk is true.
So long as their desiring minds are eager to get something,
they swear to anything. No promise do they spare.
But as soon as the lust in their desirous intent is gratified,
they remember nothing they said, they care nothing for their lies.
[tr. Banks (1997)]Now, no woman should believe a man’s pledges,
or believe there’s any truth in a man’s words:
when their minds are intent on their desire,
they have no fear of oaths, don’t spare their promises:
but as soon as the lust of their eager mind is slaked
they fear no words, they care nothing for perjury.
[tr. Kline (2001)]Henceforth let no woman trust a man's sworn promise,
or hope that he'll ever be true to his given word,
for as long as his lustful heart is bent on possession
he'll shrink from no oath, stop short at no promises,
but the moment hte urge of his ardent mind is sated
he forgets all he's said, breaks oaths without a tremor.
[tr. Green (2005)]Now already let no woman trust a man swearing,
let none hope that the speeches of man are faithful,
for whom while the desiring mind is eager to grasp something,
They fear to swear nothing, they spare to promise nothing.
But as soon as the lust of the desiring mind has been satisfied,
They feared the words as nothing, they care for the false oaths not at all.
[tr. Wikisource (2018)]
Quotations about:
battle of the sexes
Note not all quotations have been tagged, so Search may find additional quotes on this topic.
A man always blames the woman who fools him. In the same way he blames the door he walks into in the dark.
H. L. Mencken (1880-1956) American writer and journalist [Henry Lewis Mencken]
A Little Book in C Major, ch. 6, § 1 (1916)
(Source)
Repeated in A Book of Burlesques, ch. 12 "The Old Subject," § 6 (1924)] and Chrestomathy, ch. 30 "Sententiae" (1949).
BENEDICK: What, my dear Lady Disdain! Are you yet living?
BEATRICE: Is it possible disdain should die while she hath such meet food to feed it as Signior Benedick? Courtesy itself must convert to disdain, if you come in her presence.
William Shakespeare (1564-1616) English dramatist and poet
Much Ado About Nothing, Act 1, sc. 1, l. 116ff (1.1.116-121) (1598)
(Source)
Men are convinced that women have it easy, but they haven’t convinced many women.
Mignon McLaughlin (1913-1983) American journalist and author
The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, ch. 3 (1966)
(Source)
It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage. A man always imagines a woman to be ready for any body who asks her.
I cannot think well of a man who sports with any woman’s feelings; and there may often be a great deal more suffered than a stander-by can judge of.
“Educate women like men,” says Rousseau, “and the more they resemble our sex the less power will they have over us.” This is the very point I aim at. I do not wish them to have power over men; but over themselves.
Mary Wollstonecraft (1759-1797) English social philosopher, feminist, writer
A Vindication of the Rights of Woman, ch. 4 (1792)
(Source)
Usually elided to "I do not wish women to have power over men; but over themselves."
The commitment problem has caused many women to mistakenly conclude that men, as a group, have the emotional maturity of hamsters. This is not the case. A hamster is much more capable of making a lasting commitment to a woman, especially if she gives it those little food pellets. Whereas a guy, in a relationship, will consume the pellets of companionship, and he will run on the exercise wheel of lust, but as soon as he senses the door of commitment is about to close and trap him in the wire cage of true intimacy, he’ll squirm out, scamper across the kitchen floor of uncertainty, and hide under the refrigerator of nonreadiness.
Dave Barry (b. 1947) American humorist
The Greatest Invention in the History of Mankind is Beer (2001)
(Source)
Men weren’t really the enemy — they were fellow victims suffering from an outmoded masculine mystique that made them feel unnecessarily inadequate when there were no bears to kill.
Betty Friedan (1921-2006) American writer, feminist, activist
The Feminine Mystique, Epilogue (1974 ed.)
(Source)
Sometimes paraphrased: "Man is not the enemy here, but the fellow victim."
Agatha looked up. “I guess. I just wonder how many other girls have to worry about whether or not it’s smart to really trust their … you know, the guys they –”
Lady Vitriox crossed her arms. “All of them,” she said flatly.
“But mine has an army!”
The old woman shook her head. “They all do, my Lady. It consists of other men.”
Phil Foglio (b. 1956) American writer, cartoonist
Agatha H. and the Siege of Mechanicsburg (2020) [with Kaja Foglio]
(Source)
Men who don’t like girls with brains don’t like girls.
Mignon McLaughlin (1913-1983) American journalist and author
The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, ch. 3 (1966)
(Source)
Originally published in McLaughlin's "The Neurotic's Notebook" column in The Atlantic, some time in 1965.
There is, in fact, no incompatibility between the principles of feminism and the possibility that men and women are not psychologically identical. To repeat: equality is not the empirical claim that all groups of humans are interchangeable; it is the moral principle that individuals should not be judged or constrained by the average properties of their group. In the case of gender, the barely defeated Equal Rights Amendment put it succinctly: “Equality of Rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or any state on account of sex.” If we recognize this principle, no one has to spin myths about the indistinguishability of the sexes to justify equality. Nor should anyone invoke sex differences to justify discriminatory policies or to hector women into doing what they don’t want to do.
Steven Pinker (b. 1954) Canadian-American cognitive psychologist, linguist, author
The Blank Slate, Part 5, ch. 18 (2002)
(Source)
The allurement that women hold out to men is precisely the allurement that Cape Hatteras holds out to sailors: they are enormously dangerous and hence enormously fascinating.
H. L. Mencken (1880-1956) American writer and journalist [Henry Lewis Mencken]
“The Incomparable Buzz-Saw,” The Smart Set (May 1919)
(Source)
We cannot do without it [marriage] yet we go and besmirch it, with the result that it is like birds and cages: the ones outside despair of getting in: the ones inside only care to get out.
[Nous ne nous en pouvons passer, & l’allons avilissant. Il en advient ce qui se voit aux cages, les oiseaux qui en sont dehors, desesperent d’y entrer ; & d’un pareil soin en sortir, ceux qui sont au dedans]
Michel de Montaigne (1533-1592) French essayist
Essays, Book 3, ch. 5 “On Some Verses of Virgil [Sur des vers de Virgile]” (1586) (3.5) (1595) [tr. Screech (1987)]
(Source)
First published in the 1588 ed.
(Source (French)). Alternate translations:We cannot be without it, and yet we disgrace and vilifie the same. It may be compared to a cage, the birdes without dispaire to get in, and those within dispaire to get out.
[tr. Florio (1603)]We cannot live without it, and yet we do nothing but decry it. It happens, as with Cages, the Birds without despair to get in, and those within despair of getting out.
[tr. Cotton (1686); Cotton/Hazlitt (1877)]We can not do without it, and yet we express contempt for it. The same thing happens that we see about cages: the birds outside are in despair at not getting in, and those within feel equal discomfort at not getting out.
[tr. Ives (1925)]We cannot do without it, and yet we go about’ debasing it. The result is what is observed about cages: the birds outside despair of getting in, and those inside are equally anxious to get out.
[tr. Frame (1943)]
Perhaps the condition of women affords, in all countries, the best criterion by which to judge the character of men.
Frances "Fanny" Wright (1795-1852) Scottish-American writer, lecturer, social reformer
Views of Society and Manners in America, Letter 23, Mar. 1820 (1821)
(Source)
Women are supposed to be very calm generally; but women feel just as men feel; they need exercise for their faculties and a field for their efforts as much as their brothers do; they suffer from too rigid a restraint, too absolute a stagnation, precisely as men would suffer; and it is narrow-minded in their more privileged fellow-creatures to say that they ought to confine themselves to making puddings and knitting stockings, to playing on the piano and embroidering bags. It is thoughtless to condemn them, or laugh at them, if they seek to do more or learn more than custom has pronounced necessary for their sex.
Charlotte Brontë (1816-1855) British novelist [pseud. Currer Bell]
Jane Eyre, ch. 12 [Jane] (1847)
(Source)
Men know that women are an over-match for them, and therefore they choose the weakest or most ignorant. If they did not think so, they never could be afraid of women knowing as much as themselves.
“Why do men feel threatened by women?” I asked a male friend of mine. (I love that wonderful rhetorical device, “a male friend of mine.” It’s often used by female journalists when they want to say something particularly bitchy but don’t want to be held responsible for it themselves. It also lets people know that you do have male friends, that you aren’t one of those fire-breathing mythical monsters, The Radical Feminists, who walk around with little pairs of scissors and kick men in the shins if they open doors for you. “A male friend of mine” also gives — let us admit it — a certain weight to the opinions expressed.) So this male friend of mine, who does by the way exist, conveniently entered into the following dialogue. “I mean,” I said, “men are bigger, most of the time, they can run faster, strangle better, and they have on the average a lot more money and power.” “They’re afraid women will laugh at them,” he said. “Undercut their world view.” Then I asked some women students in a quickie poetry seminar I was giving, “Why do women feel threatened by men?” “They’re afraid of being killed,” they said.
Margaret Atwood (b. 1939) Canadian writer, literary critic, environmental activist
“Writing the Male Character,” Hagey Lecture, U. of Waterloo (9 Feb 1982)
(Source)
Published in a revised version as "Writing the Male Character," Second Words: Selected Critical Prose, 1960-1982 (1983).
Usually paraphrased, "Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them."