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Almost everybody is deeply affected when some one he loves suffers from cancer. Most people are moved when they see the sufferings of unknown patients in hospitals. Yet when they read that the death-rate from cancer is such-and-such, they are as a rule only moved to momentary personal fear lest they or some one dear to them should acquire the disease. The same is true of war: people think it dreadful when their son or brother is mutilated, but they do not think it a million times as dreadful that a million people should be mutilated. A man who is full of kindliness in all personal dealings may derive his income from incitement to war or from the torture of children in “backward” countries.
All these familiar phenomena are due to the fact that sympathy is not stirred, in most people, by a merely abstract stimulus. A large proportion of the evils in the modern world would cease if this could be remedied.

Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970) English mathematician and philosopher
Education and the Good Life, Part 1, ch. 2 “The Aims of Education” (1926)
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Added on 25-Mar-26 | Last updated 18-Mar-26
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The next stage in the development of a desirable form of sensitiveness is sympathy. There is a purely physical sympathy: a very young child will cry because a brother or sister is crying. This, I suppose, affords the basis for the further developments.
The two enlargements that are needed are: first, to feel sympathy even when the sufferer is not an object of special affection; secondly, to feel it when the suffering is merely known to be occurring, not sensibly present. The second of these enlargements depends mainly upon intelligence. It may only go so far as sympathy with suffering which is portrayed vividly and touchingly, as in a good novel; it may, on the other hand, go so far as to enable a man to be moved emotionally by statistics. This capacity for abstract sympathy is as rare as it is important.

Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970) English mathematician and philosopher
Education and the Good Life, Part 1, ch. 2 “The Aims of Education” (1926)
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This (in the penultimate sentence) appears to be the origin of phrases such as:
  • "The of a truly intelligent person to be moved by statistics."
  • "he mark of a civilized man is the ability to look at a column of numbers, and weep."
Sometimes attributed to George Bernard Shaw or Oscar Wilde.

For more discussion, see: Quote Origin: It Is the Mark of a Truly Intelligent Person To Be Moved By Statistics – Quote Investigator®.
 
Added on 18-Mar-26 | Last updated 18-Mar-26
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Being offended is a natural consequence of leaving the house.

Fran Lebowitz (b. 1950) American journalist, essayist
Interview (2021-02-17), BBC Newsnight

(Source (Video), at the 1:23 mark)
 
Added on 20-Jan-26 | Last updated 20-Jan-26
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Of course no one is so sensitive as you, but try to remember they think they are.

Mignon McLaughlin (1913-1983) American journalist and author
The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, ch. 4 (1966)
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Added on 22-Dec-25 | Last updated 22-Dec-25
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One of the effects of safe and civilized life is an immense oversensitiveness which makes all the primary emotions seem somewhat disgusting. Generosity is as painful as meanness, gratitude as hateful as ingratitude.

George Orwell (1903-1950) English journalist, essayist, writer [pseud. of Eric Arthur Blair]
Essay (1942-08), “Looking Back on the Spanish War, ch. 3, New Road (1943-06)
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Added on 21-Nov-25 | Last updated 21-Nov-25
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You will be careful, if you are wise;
How you touch Men’s Religion, or Credit, or Eyes.

Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) American statesman, scientist, philosopher, aphorist
Poor Richard (1742 ed.)
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Added on 16-Oct-25 | Last updated 16-Oct-25
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There are many ways in which we’re become much more polite than Americans were historically. Blatant bigotry is no longer tolerated by this society. It exists, but people get into trouble for practicing it. The obligation to be considerate of others has spread to include groups that were excluded at many times.

Judith Martin (b. 1938) American author, journalist, etiquette expert [a.k.a. Miss Manners]
Interview (2011-08), “Q and A with Miss Manners,” by Arcynta Ali Childs, Smithsonian magazine
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Added on 8-Sep-25 | Last updated 8-Sep-25
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My great wish is to go on in a strict but silent performance of my duty: to avoid attracting notice and to keep my name out of newspapers, because I find the pain of a little censure, even when it is unfounded, is more acute than the pleasure of much praise.

Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) American political philosopher, polymath, statesman, US President (1801-09)
Letter (1789-093-13) to Francis Hopkinson
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Added on 5-Aug-24 | Last updated 5-Aug-24
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Bad reviews jar me down to the instep. I will never become philosophically resigned to a negative reaction to something I’ve written.

Rod Serling (1924-1975) American screenwriter, playwright, television producer, narrator
Patterns, Introduction (1957)
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Added on 6-Sep-22 | Last updated 6-Sep-22
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“Are you seeing a psychiatrist?” as a conversation opener would nowadays earn you a punch in the nose, but for fifty years it was a compliment. It meant, “One can plainly see you are sensitive, intense, and interesting, and therefore neurotic.” Only the dullest of clods trudged around without a neurosis.

Barbara Holland (1933-2010) American author
Wasn’t the Grass Greener?: A Curmudgeon’s Fond Memories (1999)
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Added on 21-Feb-22 | Last updated 21-Feb-22
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Thou canst not joke an Enemy into a Friend; but thou may’st a Friend into an Enemy.

Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) American statesman, scientist, philosopher, aphorist
Poor Richard (1739 ed.)
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Added on 17-Sep-20 | Last updated 3-Apr-25
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For a man of sensitivity and compassion to exercise great powers in a time of crisis is a grim and agonizing thing.

Richard Hofstadter (1916-1970) American historian and intellectual
The American Political Tradition: And the Men Who Made It, Part 5, ch. 7 (1958)
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Referring to Abraham Lincoln and the Civil War.
 
Added on 24-Mar-20 | Last updated 24-Mar-20
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I believe in aristocracy, though — if that is the right word, and if a democrat may use it. Not an aristocracy of power, based upon rank and influence, but an aristocracy of the sensitive, the considerate and the plucky. Its members are to be found in all nations and classes, and all through the ages, and there is a secret understanding between them when they meet. They represent the true human tradition, the one permanent victory of our queer race over cruelty and chaos. Thousands of them perish in obscurity, a few are great names. They are sensitive for others as well as for themselves, they are considerate without being fussy, their pluck is not swankiness but the power to endure, and they can take a joke.

E. M. Forster (1879-1970) English novelist, essayist, critic, librettist [Edward Morgan Forster]
“What I Believe,” The Nation (1938-07-16)
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Collected in Two Cheers for Democracy (1951).
 
Added on 5-Feb-20 | Last updated 25-Mar-24
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Nothing is more embarrassing in the ordinary intercourse of life than this irritable patriotism of the Americans. A stranger may be well inclined to praise many of the institutions of their country, but he begs permission to blame some of the peculiarities which he observes — a permission which is however inexorably refused.

Alexis de Tocqueville (1805-1859) French writer, diplomat, politician
Democracy in America, Vol. 1, “Public Spirit in the United States” (1835) [tr. Reeve (1839)]
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Added on 21-Nov-18 | Last updated 21-Nov-18
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Guilt hath very quick ears to an accusation.

Henry Fielding (1707-1754) English novelist, dramatist, satirist
Amelia, ch. 11 (1751)
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Added on 8-Jun-17 | Last updated 8-Jun-17
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Just because you’re offended, doesn’t mean you’re right.

Ricky Gervais (b. 1961) English comedian, actor, director, writer
Tweet (12 Oct 2013)
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Added on 8-Sep-16 | Last updated 8-Sep-16
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It really hurts me very much to suppose that I have wronged anybody on earth.

Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865) American lawyer, politician, US President (1861-65)
Speech (1858-10-13), Lincoln-Douglas Debate No. 6, Quincy, Illinois
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Added on 4-Jan-16 | Last updated 3-Apr-25
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A weak mind does not accumulate force enough to hurt itself; stupidity often saves a man from going mad.

Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. (1809-1894) American poet, essayist, scholar
Article (1857-12), “The Autocrat of the Breakfast-Table,” Atlantic Monthly
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Collected in The Autocrat of the Breakfast Table, ch. 2 (1858).
 
Added on 18-Dec-14 | Last updated 23-Dec-24
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Other nations have been called thin-skinned, but the citizens of the Union have, apparently, no skins at all; they wince if a breeze blows over them, unless it be tempered with adulation.

Frances Trollope (1779-1863) English novelist and writer
Domestic Manners of the Americans (1832)
 
Added on 25-Jun-14 | Last updated 25-Jun-14
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The Americans, in their intercourse with strangers, appear impatient of the smallest censure and insatiable of praise.

Alexis de Tocqueville (1805-1859) French writer, diplomat, politician
Democracy in America, Vol. 2, sec. 3, ch. 16 (1840)
 
Added on 18-Jun-14 | Last updated 18-Jun-14
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Every man who attacks my belief, diminishes in some degree my confidence in it, and therefore makes me uneasy; and I am angry with him who makes me uneasy.

Samuel Johnson (1709-1784) English writer, lexicographer, critic
Comment (3 Apr 1775)

In James Boswell, The Life of Samuel Johnson (1791)
 
Added on 11-Apr-14 | Last updated 11-Apr-14
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HARRIS: I’ve been thinking about myself and I think I can become the kind of person that’s worth you staying for. First of all, I’m a man who can cry. Now it’s true, it’s usually when I’ve hurt myself, but it’s a start.

Steve Martin (b. 1945) American comedian, actor, writer, producer, musician
L. A. Story (1991)
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Added on 16-May-12 | Last updated 30-Sep-24
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Conventional people are roused to fury by departure from convention, largely because they consider such departures as a criticism of themselves. They will pardon much unconventionality in a man who has enough jollity and friendliness to make it clear, even to the stupidest, that he is not engaged in criticizing them.

Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970) English mathematician and philosopher
Conquest of Happiness, Part 1, ch. 9 “Fear of Public Opinion” (1930)
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Added on 3-Nov-11 | Last updated 8-Jan-25
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If what we profess is not an organic part of our understanding, we are likely to profess it with vehemence and intolerance. Intolerance is the “Do Not Touch” sign on something that cannot bear touching. We do not mind having our hair ruffled, but we will not tolerate any familiarity with the toupee which covers our baldness.

Eric Hoffer (1902-1983) American writer, philosopher, longshoreman
Passionate State of Mind, Aphorism 62 (1955)
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Added on 1-Feb-04 | Last updated 17-Apr-25
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