The only problems that have simple solutions are simple problems. The only managers that have simple problems have simple minds. Problems that arise in organisations are almost always the product of interactions of parts, never the action of a single part. Complex problems do not have simple solutions.
Russell L. Ackoff (1919-2009) American organizational theorist, consultant, management scientist
“Case Histories Five Years after,” Operations Research 8.2 (1960)
Write while the heat is in you. When the farmer burns a hole in his yoke, he carries the hot iron quickly from the fire to the wood, for every moment is less effectual to penetrate (pierce) it. It must be used instantly or it is useless. The writer who postpones the recording of his thoughts uses an iron which has cooled to burn a hole with. He cannot inflame the minds of his audience.
Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862) American philosopher and writer
Journal (10 Feb 1852)
Seven cities warr’d for Homer, being dead;
Who, living, had no roof to shroud his head.Thomas Heywood (1570s-1641) English playwright, actor, author
The Hierarchie of the Blesed Angells (1635)
Ambitious Men cheat themselves, when they fix upon any Ends for their Ambition; those Ends, when they are attained to, are converted into Means, subordinate to something farther.
François VI, duc de La Rochefoucauld (1613-1680) French epigrammatist, memoirist, noble
Réflexions ou sentences et maximes morales [Reflections; or Sentences and Moral Maxims] (1665-1678) [tr. Stanhope (1694), Part 4, ¶65]
(Source)
Reported in multiple translations, but no modern ones. I cannot find the analog for it, the French original, or the "official" number.
Appears in the 1706 (Powell) ed. of Stanhope as ¶711.
Alternate translations:The ambitious deceive themselves in proposing an end to their ambition; for that end, when attained, becomes a means.
[pub. Donaldson (1783), ¶32]When the ambitious propose an end to their ambition, they deceive themselves; for, when attained, the end becomes a mean.
[ed. Carville (1835), ¶29]
Our trouble is that we do not demand enough of the people who represent us. We are responsible for their activities. … We must spur them to more imagination and enterprise in making a push into the unknown; we must make clear that we intend to have responsible and courageous leadership.
Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962) First Lady of the US (1933-45), politician, diplomat, activist
Tomorrow Is Now (1963)
(Source)
For all but one in thousands the goal of their thinking is the point at which they have become tired of thinking.
[Tausenden für einen ist das Ziel ihres Nachdenkens die Stelle, wo sie des Nachdenkens müde geworden.]Gotthold Lessing (1729-1781) German playwright, philosopher, dramaturg, writer
Letter (1771-01-09), to Moses Mendelssohn
(Source)
(Source (German)). Alternate translations:In a thousand cases to one, the goal of reflection is set at the point where one gets tired of reflection.
(Source)For the vast majority of men, the object of their reflection lies at the point where they become tired of reflecting.
(Source)
We are in difficulties on all sides, but never cornered; we see no answer to our problems, but never despair; we have been persecuted, but never deserted; knocked down, but never killed.
The Bible (The New Testament) (AD 1st - 2nd C) Christian sacred scripture
2 Corinthians 4:8-9 [JB (1966)]
(Source)
Alternate translations:We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed.
[KJV (1611)]We are often troubled, but not crushed; sometimes in doubt, but never in despair; there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend; and though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed.
[GNT (1976)]We are subjected to every kind of hardship, but never distressed; we see no way out but we never despair; we are pursued but never cut off; knocked down, but still have some life in us.
[NJB (1985)]We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
[NIV (2011 ed.)]We are experiencing all kinds of trouble, but we aren’t crushed. We are confused, but we aren’t depressed. We are harassed, but we aren’t abandoned. We are knocked down, but we aren’t knocked out.
[CEB (2011)]We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed.
[NRSV (2021 ed.)]
If you steal from one author, it’s plagiarism; if you steal from many, it’s research.
Wilson Mizner (1876-1933) American screenwriter and wit
In Alva Johnson, The Legendary Mizners, ch. 4 (1953)
An act of goodness surpasses a thousand prayers.
Sa'adi (1184-1283/1291?) Persian poet [a.k.a. Sa'di, Moslih Eddin Sa'adi, Mushrif-ud-Din Abdullah, Muslih-ud-Din Mushrif ibn Abdullah, Mosleh al-Din Saadi Shirazi, Shaikh Mosslehedin Saadi Shirazi]
The Maxims of Sa’di, 1 [tr. Nakosteen (1977)]
With hearts fortified with these animating Reflections, we most solemnly, before God and the World, declare, that, exerting the utmost Energy of those Powers, which our beneficent Creator hath graciously bestowed upon us, the Arms we have been compelled by our Enemies to assume, we will, in defiance of every Hazard, with unabating Firmness and Perseverance, employ for the preservation of our Liberties; being with one Mind resolved to die Freemen rather than to live Slaves.
Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) American political philosopher, polymath, statesman, US President (1801-09)
“Declaration of the Causes and Necessity for Taking Up Arms” (1775-07-06) [with John Dickinson]
(Source)
Final version as approved by the Continental Congress. An earlier draft by Jefferson used these terms:We do, then, most solemnly before God and the world declare that regardless of every consequence, at the risk of every distress, the arms we have been compelled to assume we will use with perseverance, exerting to their utmost energies all those powers which our Creator hath given us to preserve that liberty which he committed to us in sacred deposit and to protect from every hostile hand our lives and our properties.
Books are the carriers of civilization. Without books, history is silent, literature, dumb, science crippled, thought and speculation at a standstill. Without books, the development of civilization would have been impossible. The are engines of change (as the poet said), windows on the world, and lighthouses erected in the sea of time. They are companions, teachers, magicians, bankers of the treasures of the mind. Books are humanity in print.
Barbara W. Tuchman (1912-1989) American historian and author
“The Book,” Lecture, Library of Congress (17 Oct 1979)
(Source)
Reprinted in Authors' League Bulletin (Nov-Dec 1979)
The great and glorious masterpiece of man is to know how to live to purpose; all other things, to reign, to lay up treasure, to build, are, at most, but little appendices and props.
[Le glorieux chef-d’oeuvre de l’homme, c’est vivre à propos. Toutes autres choses ; regner, thesauriser, bastir, n’en sont qu’appendicules et adminicules, pour le plus.]
Michel de Montaigne (1533-1592) French essayist
Essays, Book 3, ch. 13 “On Experience [De l’Experience]” (after 1588) (3.13) (1595) [tr. Cotton/Hazlitt (1877)]
(Source)
This passage was added to the original version of the essay, published 1588, for the 1595 edition.
(Source (French)). Alternate translations:The glorious master-piece of man, is, to live to the purpose. All other things, as to raigne, to governe, to hoarde up treasure, to thrive and to build, are for the most part but appendixes and supportes thereunto.
[tr. Florio (1603)]The glorious Master-piece of Man is to know how to live to purpose; all other things, to reign, to lay up Treasure, and to build, are at the most but little Appendixes, and little Props.
[tr. Cotton (1686)]Man's great and glorious master-work is to live befittingly; all other things -- to reign, to lay up treasure, to build -- are at the best mere accessories and aids.
[tr. Ives (1925)]Our great and glorious masterpiece is to live appropriately. All other things, ruling, hoarding, building, are only little appendages and props, at most.
[tr. Frame (1943)]Our most great and glorious achievement is to live our life fittingly. Everything else -- reigning, building, laying up treasure -- are at most tiny props and small accessories.
[tr. Screech (1987)]
The awakenings of remorse, virtuous shame and indignation, the glow of moral approbation,– if they do not lead to action, grow less and less vivid every time they recur, till at length the mind grows absolutely callous.
Anna Laetitia Barbauld (1743-1825) English woman of letters, educator, editor [née Aikin]
“An Inquiry into those Kinds of Distress which Excite Agreeable Sensations” (1773)
Do as you would be done by, is the surest method that I know of pleasing. Observe carefully what pleases you in others, and probably the same thing in you will please others.
Lord Chesterfield (1694-1773) English statesman, wit [Philip Dormer Stanhope]
Letter to his son, #129 (16 Oct 1747)
(Source)
A common theme in Chesterfield's advice, e.g.:
Letter #144 (9 Mar 1748):Observe carefully, then, what displeases or pleases you in others, and be persuaded, that, in general, the same things will please or displease them in you.
Letter #229 (9 Jul 1750):Pleasure is necessarily reciprocal; no one feels, who does not at the same time give it. To be pleased, one must please. What pleases you in others, will in general please them in you.
There is much in the Bible against which every instinct of my being rebels, so much that I regret the necessity which has compelled me to read it through from beginning to end. I do not think that the knowledge which I have gained of its history and sources compensates me for the unpleasant details it has forced upon my attention.
Helen Keller (1880-1968) American author and lecturer
The Story of My Life, pt. 1, ch. 21 (1903)
Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.
Marcus Aurelius (AD 121-180) Roman emperor (161-180), Stoic philosopher
Meditations, Book 10, #16 [tr. Staniforth (1964)]
And so Jesus gave us a new norm of greatness. If you want to be important — wonderful. If you want to be recognized — wonderful. If you want to be great — wonderful. But recognize that he who is greatest among you shall be your servant. That’s a new definition of greatness. And this morning, the thing that I like about it: by giving that definition of greatness, it means that everybody can be great, because everybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and your verb agree to serve. You don’t have to know about Plato and Aristotle to serve. You don’t have to know Einstein’s theory of relativity to serve. You don’t have to know the second theory of thermodynamics in physics to serve. You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love. And you can be that servant.
Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968) American clergyman, civil rights leader, social activist, preacher
“The Drum Major Instinct,” sermon, Ebenezer Baptist Church, Atlanta (4 Feb 1968)
(Source)
See Matthew 23:11-12.
Toward no crime have men shown themselves so cold-bloodedly cruel as in punishing differences of belief.
James Russell Lowell (1819-1891) American diplomat, essayist, poet
Among My Books (1870)
We want so much more—something the books on aesthetics take little notice of. But the poets and the mythologies know all about it. We do not want merely to see beauty, though, God knows, even that is bounty enough. We want something else which can hardly be put into words—to be united with the beauty we see, to pass into it, to receive it into ourselves, to bathe in it, to become part of it.
C. S. Lewis (1898-1963) English writer, literary scholar, lay theologian [Clive Staples Lewis]
The Weight of Glory: And Other Addresses (1949)
He who is greatest among you shall be your servant; whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.
The Bible (The New Testament) (AD 1st - 2nd C) Christian sacred scripture
Matthew 23:11-12
The art of life isn’t controlling what happens, which is impossible; it’s using what happens.
Gloria Steinem (b. 1934) American feminist, journalist, activist
Moving Beyond Words, “Doing Sixty” (1994)
Poetry is to prose as dancing is to walking.
John Wain (1925-1994) English poet, novelist, critic
Radio broadcast, BBC, London (13 Jan 1976)
The trouble with being number one in the world — at anything — is that it takes a certain mentality to attain that position in the first place, and that is something of a driving, perfectionist attitude, so that once you do achieve number one, you don’t relax and enjoy it.
Billie Jean King (b. 1943) American tennis player
Billie Jean (1982)
My greatest fear has always been that I would be afraid — afraid physically or mentally or morally and allow myself to be influenced by fear instead of by my honest convictions.
Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962) First Lady of the US (1933-45), politician, diplomat, activist
If You Ask Me (1946)
Trust no friend without faults,
And love a maiden, but no angel.[Trau keinem Freunde sonder Mängel,
Und leib’ ein Mädchen, kienem Engel.]Gotthold Lessing (1729-1781) German playwright, philosopher, dramaturg, writer
Note in a Family Register (1778)
Alt. trans.: "Trust in no friend, rather forebear; / Love a sweet maid, no angel rare."
Man is born to live, not to prepare for life. Life itself — the gift of life — is such a breathtakingly serious thing! — Why substitute this childish harlequinade of adolescent fantasies, these schoolboy escapades?
Boris Pasternak (1890-1960) Russian poet, novelist, and literary translator
Doctor Zhivago [До́ктор Жива́го], Part 2, ch. 9 “Varykino,” sec. 14 [Yury to Larissa] (1955) [tr. Hayward & Harari (1958), UK ed.]
(Source)
Criticizing the immature aspirations of revolutionaries.
Alternate translation:Man is born to live, not to prepare for life. Life itself, the phenomenon of life, the gift of life, is so breath-takingly serious! So why substitute this childish harlequinade of immature fantasies, these schoolboy escapades?
[tr. Hayward & Harari (1958), US ed.]Man is born to live, not to prepare for life. And life itself, the phenomenon of life, the gift of life, is so thrillingly serious! Why then substitute for it a childish harlequinade of immature inventions, these escapes of Chekhovian schoolboys to America?
[tr. Pevear & Volokhonsky (2010)]
COUNTESS: Love all, trust a few,
Do wrong to none.William Shakespeare (1564-1616) English dramatist and poet
All’s Well That Ends Well, Act 1, sc. 1, l. 66ff (1.1.66-67)(1602?)
(Source)
Approach the easy as though it were difficult, and the difficult as though it were easy; the first, lest overconfidence make you careless, and the second, lest faint-heartedness make you afraid.
[Lo fácil se ha de emprender como dificultoso, y lo dificultoso como fácil. Allí porque la confianza no descuide, aquí porque la desconfianza no desmaye.]
Baltasar Gracián y Morales (1601-1658) Spanish Jesuit priest, writer, philosopher
The Art of Worldly Wisdom [Oráculo Manual y Arte de Prudencia], § 204 (1647) [tr. Fischer (1937)]
(Source)
(Source (Spanish)). Alternate translations:What is easie ought to be set about, as if it were difficult; and what is difficult as if it were easie. The one for fear of slackening through too much confidence; and the other for fear of losing courage through too much apprehensiveness.
[Flesher ed. (1685)]Attempt easy tasks as if they were difficult, and difficult as if they were easy. In the one case that confidence may not fall asleep, in the other that it may not be dismayed.
[tr. Jacobs (1892)]Undertake the easy as though it were difficult, and the difficult as though it were easy, so as not to grow overconfident or discouraged.
[tr. Maurer (1992)]
MAL: Well, my days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle.
Joss Whedon (b. 1964) American screenwriter, author, producer [Joseph Hill Whedon]
Firefly, 1×06 “Our Mrs. Reynolds” (2 Oct 2002)
A bureaucrat is one who has the power to say “no” but none to say “yes”. Bureaucrats can find an infinite number of reasons for rejecting any proposed change, but can find none for accepting it.
Russell L. Ackoff (1919-2009) American organizational theorist, consultant, management scientist
A Little Book of F-laws (2006)
Life is one day at a time. And thank God! I couldn’t take much more.
Daniel Patrick Moynihan (1927-2003) American politician, diplomat, sociologist
Meet the Press (19 Jun 1994)
One of the oldest Russian proverbs remains as inexorably true in modern America: “No one is hanged who has money in his pocket.” Or, one might say, capital punishment is only for those without capital.
Sydney J. Harris (1917-1986) Anglo-American columnist, journalist, author
Syndicated column, Chicago Daily News (Apr 1971)
To spend more time in learning is better than spending more time in praying.
Muhammad (570-632) Arabian merchant, prophet, founder of Islam [Mohammed]
The Sayings of Muhammed, #277 [tr. Al-Suhrawardy (1941)]
We should be wanting to ourselves, we should be perfidious to posterity, we should be unworthy that free ancestry from which we derive our descent, should we submit with folded arms to military butchery & depredation ….
Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) American political philosopher, polymath, statesman, US President (1801-09)
“Declaration of the Causes and Necessity for Taking Up Arms” (1775-07-06) [with John Dickinson]
(Source)
Final draft as approved by the Continental Congress.
Wooden-headedness consists of assessing a situation in terms of preconceived, fixed notions while ignoring or rejecting any contrary signs. It is acting according to wish while not allowing oneself to be confused by the facts.
Barbara W. Tuchman (1912-1989) American historian and author
“An Inquiry into the Persistence of Unwisdom in Government,” Esquire (1980)
Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect. We take what we get and are thankful it’s no worse than it is.
Margaret Mitchell (1900-1949) American author and journalist.
Gone with the Wind, ch. 53 [Ashley] (1936)
There is a fire-fly in the southern clime
Which shineth only when upon the wing;
So it is with the mind: when once we rest,
We darken.Philip James Bailey (1816-1902) English poet, lawyer
Festus, Sc. “A Village Feast – Evening” [Festus] (1839)
(Source)
Usually paraphrased (earliest source (1872)):The firefly only shines when on the wing.
So is it with the mind -- when once we rest
We darken.
At the bottom of every social problem we will find a social wrong.
Henry George (1839-1897) American economist
Social Problems, ch. 1 (1883)
There is a certain dignity to be kept up in pleasures, as well as in business.
Lord Chesterfield (1694-1773) English statesman, wit [Philip Dormer Stanhope]
Letter to his son, #216 (5 Feb 1750)
(Source)
Knowledge is happiness, because to have knowledge — broad, deep knowledge — is to know true ends from false, and lofty things from low. To know the thoughts and deeds that have marked man’s progress is to feel the great heart-throbs of humanity through the centuries; and if one does not feel in these pulsations a heavenward striving, one must indeed be deaf to the harmonies of life.
Helen Keller (1880-1968) American author and lecturer
The Story of My Life, pt. 1, ch. 20 (1903)
Economists are very good at saying that something cannot go on forever, but not so good at saying when it will stop.
Herb Stein (1916-1999) American economist
(Attributed)
Most men that do thrive in the world do forget to take pleasure during the time that they are getting their estate, but reserve that till they have got one and then it is too late for them to enjoy it.
Samuel Pepys (1633-1703) English diarist, naval administrator
Diary (1666-03-10)
If forty million people say a foolish thing it does not become a wise one, but the wise man is foolish to give them the lie.
W. Somerset Maugham (1874-1965) English novelist and playwright [William Somerset Maugham]
A Writer’s Notebook (1949)
An entry dated 1901. More discussion about this quotation: If Fifty Million People Say a Foolish Thing, It Is Still a Foolish Thing – Quote Investigator
One thing shines clear in the heart’s sweet reason,
One lightning over the chasm runs —
That to turn from love is the world’s one treason
That darkens all the suns.Edwin Markham (1852-1940) American poet
“The Crowning Hour” (2), The Shoes of Happiness, and Other Poems (1913)
You ever look at their faces? “We’re pro-life.” Don’t they look it? Don’t they just exude joie de vivre?
Bill Hicks (1961-1994) American stand-up comedian, social critic, satirist, musician [William Melvin "Bill" Hicks]
Filling Up the Hump (1993)
Be assured, my young friend, that there is a great deal of ruin in a nation.
Adam Smith (1723-1790) Scottish economist
Letter to Sir John Sinclair of Ulbster
When Sinclair had written him, after the Battle of Saratoga (Oct 1777), "If we go on at this rate, the nation must be ruined." In The Correspondence of Sir John Sinclair, Bt (1831).
To accomplish great things we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.
Anatole France (1844-1924) French poet, journalist, novelist, Nobel Laureate [pseud. of Jaques-Anatole-François Thibault]
Speech, Académie Française (24 Dec 1896)
MAL: I would appreciate it if one person on this boat would not assume I’m an evil, lecherous hump.
ZOE: No one’s saying that, sir.
WASH: Yeah, we’re pretty much just giving each other significant glances and laughing incessantly.
Joss Whedon (b. 1964) American screenwriter, author, producer [Joseph Hill Whedon]
Firefly, 1×06 “Our Mrs. Reynolds” (2 Oct 2002)
When a mess, which is a system of problems, is taken apart, it loses its essential properties and so does each of its parts. The behavior of a mess depends more on how the treatment of its parts interact than how they act independently of each other. A partial solution to a whole system of problems is better than whole solutions of each of its parts taken separately.
Russell L. Ackoff (1919-2009) American organizational theorist, consultant, management scientist
“The future of operational research is past,” The Journal of the Operational Research Society, Vol 30 (1979)
I shall stay in jail to the end of my days before I make a butchery of my conscience.
John Bunyan (1628–1688) English Christian writer, preacher
(Attributed)
Quoted in M. L. King, Jr., "Letter from Birmingham City Jail" (16 Apr 1963).
They are escaped convicts. His Majesty is fortunate to be rid of such rabble. Their true God is power.
(Other Authors and Sources)
Oliver Sharpin, The American Rebels (1804)
The boast of heraldry, the pomp of pow’r,
And all that beauty, all that wealth e’er gave,
Awaits alike th’inevitable hour.
The paths of glory lead but to the grave.Thomas Gray (1716-1771) English poet
“Elegy Written in a Country Churchyard,” st. 9, l. 33ff (1751)
(Source)
We must show by our behavior that we believe in equality and justice and that our religion teaches faith and love and charity to our fellow men. Here is where each of us has a job to do that must be done at home, because we can lose the battle on the soil of the United States just as surely as we can lose it in any one of the countries of the world.
Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962) First Lady of the US (1933-45), politician, diplomat, activist
India and the Awakening East (1953)
Man — who is he?
Too bad to be the work of God; too good for the work of chance![Der Mensch, wo ist er her?
Zu schlecht für einen Gott, zu gut fürs Ungefähr.]Gotthold Lessing (1729-1781) German playwright, philosopher, dramaturg, writer
Fragmente und Fabeln [Fragments and Fables], Fragment 6 “Die Religion” (1753)
As with many of his quotations, frequently misattributed to contemporary author Doris Lessing.
(Source (German)). Alternate translation:Man, whence is he?
Too bad to be the work of a god, too good for the work of chance.
[ed. Wood (1893)]
Songwriting is about getting the demon out of me. It’s like being possessed. You try to go to sleep, but the song won’t let you. So you have to get up and make it into something, and then you’re allowed to sleep. It’s always in the middle of the bloody night, or when you’re half-awake or tired, when your critical faculties are switched off. So letting go is what the whole game is.
John Lennon (1940-1980) English rock musician, singer, songwriter
Interview, Playboy (Sep 1980)
Mistrust all in whom the urge to punish is strong!
Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900) German philosopher and poet
Thus Spoke Zarathustra, “Of the Tarantulas” (1892) [tr. Hollingdale (1961)]
It’s a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.
W. Somerset Maugham (1874-1965) English novelist and playwright [William Somerset Maugham]
“The Treasure,” The Mixture as Before (1940)
Europe […] have totally mistaken our character. Accustomed to rise at a feather themselves, and to be always fighting, they will see in our conduct, fairly stated, that acquiescence under wrong, to a certain degree, is wisdom & not pusillanimity, and that peace and happiness are preferable to that false honor which, by eternal wars, keeps their people in eternal labor, want and wretchedness.
Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) American political philosopher, polymath, statesman, US President (1801-09)
Letter to James Madison (23 Mar 1815)
(Source)
The so-called lessons of history are for the most part the rationalizations of the victors. History is written by the survivors.
Maxwell "Max" Lerner (1902-1992) American journalist, columnist, educator
It Is Later Than You Think: The Need for a Militant Democracy (1939)
(Source)
An Ambassador is an honest man, sent to lie abroad for the good of his country.
[Legatus est vir bonus, peregrè missus ad mentiendum Reipublicae causâ.]
Henry Wotton (1568-1639) English author, diplomat, politician
Reliquiae Wottonainae (1651)
(Source)
Wotton wrote in an apology to Velserus in 1612, that during his travel through Augsburg in 1604, "This merry definition of an ambassador I had chanced to set down at my friend's, Mr. Christopher Fleckamore, in his Album". It seems to have been intended as a pun when translated to English.Sometimes translated as "An ambassador is an honest gentleman sent to lie abroad for the good of his country."
It does not require a majority to prevail, but rather an irate, tireless minority keen to set brush fires in people’s minds.
To ask the right question is already half the solution of a problem.
Carl Jung (1875-1961) Swiss psychologist
Archetypes of the Collective Unconscious (1934) [tr. Hull (1959)]
A happy life consists not in the absence, but in the mastery of hardships.
How little a thing can make us happy when we feel that we have earned it.
Anything I like is either illegal or immoral or fattening.
Alexander Woollcott (1887-1943) American critic, commentator, journalist, wit
(Attributed)
Apparently a gag attributed by Woollcott to a Frank Rand of St. Louis on his radio show in September 1933; it was then directly attributed to Woollcott in Reader's Digest in Dec. 1933. It is sometimes cited to Woollcott's essay "The Knock at the Stage Door," The North American Review (Sep 1922), but not found there.
Variants:More discussion about this quotation:
- "All the things I like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening."
- "All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening."
- "Everything I want to do is either illegal, immoral or fattening."
How convenient does it prove to be a rational animal, that knows how to find or invent a plausible pretext for whatever it has an inclination so to do.
Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) American statesman, scientist, philosopher, aphorist
The Life of Benjamin Franklin (1791)
(Source)
Often paraphrased: "Man is a rational animal. He can think up a reason for anything he wants to believe." Sometimes attributed to Anatole France.
If this is a dream, then perhaps our dreaming
Can touch life’s height to a finer fire:
Who knows but the heavens and all their seeming
Were made by the heart’s desire?Edwin Markham (1852-1940) American poet
“The Crowning Hour” (2), The Shoes of Happiness, and Other Poems (1913)
I was walking through Central Park, and I saw an old man smoking. Nothing makes a smoker happier than to see an old person smoking. This guy was ancient, bent over a walker, puffing away. I’m like, “Dude, you’re my hero! Guy your age smoking, man, it’s great.” He goes, “What? I’m 28.”
Bill Hicks (1961-1994) American stand-up comedian, social critic, satirist, musician [William Melvin "Bill" Hicks]
Performance, Oxford Playhouse (11 Nov 1992)
HAWKEYE: War isn’t Hell. War is war, and Hell is Hell. And of the two, war is a lot worse.
FR. MULCAHEY: How do you figure, Hawkeye?
HAWKEYE: Easy, Father. Tell me, who goes to Hell?
FR. MULCAHEY: Sinners, I believe.
HAWKEYE: Exactly. There are no innocent bystanders in Hell. War is chock full of them — little kids, cripples, old ladies. In fact, except for some of the brass, almost everybody involved is an innocent bystander.
Burt Prelutsky (b. 1940) American TV screenwriter, author, columnist, critic
M*A*S*H, 5×20 “The General’s Practitioner” (15 Feb 1977)
In public affairs, stupidity is more dangerous than knavery.
Woodrow Wilson (1856-1924) US President (1913-20), educator, political scientist
The New Freedom, ch. 3 (1913)
Excess of grief for the deceased is madness; for it is an injury to the living, and the dead know it not.
Xenophon (c. 431-355 BC) Greek historian and essayist
(Attributed)
(Source)
In Anon. Mental Recreation Or, Select Maxims, Sayings And Observations Of Philosophers (1831).
INARA: What did I say to you about barging into my shuttle?
MAL: That it was manly and impulsive?
INARA: Yes, precisely. Only the exact phrase I used was, “Don’t.”
Joss Whedon (b. 1964) American screenwriter, author, producer [Joseph Hill Whedon]
Firefly, 1×02 “The Train Job” [with Tim Minear] (20 Sep 2002)
Managers are not confronted with problems that are independent of each other, but with dynamic situations that consist of complex systems of changing problems that interact with each other. I call such situations messes. Problems are extracted from messes by analysis. Managers do not solve problems, they manage messes.
Russell L. Ackoff (1919-2009) American organizational theorist, consultant, management scientist
“The future of operational research is past,” The Journal of the Operational Research Society, Vol 30, pp.93-104. (1979)
The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value.
Charles Dudley Warner (1829–1900) American essayist and novelist
Backlog Studies, Eleventh Study (1872)
(Source)
It would be some time before I fully realized that the United States sees little need for diplomacy; power is enough. Only the weak rely on diplomacy. This is why the weak are so deeply concerned with the democratic principle of the sovereign equality of states, as a means of providing some small measure of equality for that which is not equal in fact. Coming from a developing country, I was trained extensively in international law and diplomacy and mistakenly assumed that the great powers, especially the United States, also trained their representatives in diplomacy and accepted the value of it. But the Roman Empire had no need for diplomacy. Nor does the United States. Diplomacy is perceived by an imperial power as a waste of time and prestige and a sign of weakness.
Boutros Boutros-Ghali (1922-2016) Egyptian politician, diplomat, UN Secretary-General (1992-1996)
Unvanquished: A U.S.-U.N. Saga (1999)
You have deeply ventured;
But all must do so who would greatly win.George Gordon, Lord Byron (1788-1824) English poet
Marino Faliero, Doge of Venice, Act 1, sc. 1 [Doge] (1821)
(Source)
Person after person has said to me in these last few days that this new world we face terrifies them. I can understand how that feeling would arise unless one believes that men are capable of greatness beyond their past achievements. … The time now calls for mankind as a whole to rise to great heights. We must have faith or we die.
Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962) First Lady of the US (1933-45), politician, diplomat, activist
“My Day” (10 Aug 1945)
After the dropping of the atomic bomb.
I’ll not willingly offend,
Nor be easily offended;
What’s amiss I’ll strive to mend,
And endure what can’t be mended.Isaac Watts (1674-1748) English theologian and hymnodist
Poems, “Moral Songs: #6 Good Resolutions”
(Source)
In Samuel Johnson, Works of English Poets, vol. 46 (1779)
To spare the guilty is to injure the innocent.
Publilius Syrus (d. 42 BC) Assyrian slave, writer, philosopher [less correctly Publius Syrus]
Sententiae [Moral Sayings], # 113 [tr. Lyman (1862)]
The probability that we may fall in the struggle ought not deter us from the support of a cause we believe to be just; it shall not deter me.
Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865) American lawyer, politician, US President (1861-65)
“The Sub-Treasury,” Speech, Illinois House of Representatives, Springfield (26 Dec 1839)
The question [is] asked, “Is it common for a nation to obtain a redress of wrongs by war?” The answer to this question you will of course draw from history. In the meantime, reason will answer it on grounds of probability, that where the wrong has been done by a weaker nation, the stronger one has generally been able to enforce redress; but where by a stronger nation, redress by war has been neither obtained nor expected by the weaker. On the contrary, the loss has been increased by the expenses of the war in blood and treasure. Yet it may have obtained another object equally securing itself from future wrong. It may have retaliated on the aggressor losses of blood and treasure far beyond the value to him of the wrong he had committed, and thus have made the advantage of that too dear a purchase to leave him in a disposition to renew the wrong in future. In this way the loss by the war may have secured the weaker nation from loss by future wrong.
Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) American political philosopher, polymath, statesman, US President (1801-09)
Letter to Noah Worcester (29 Jan 1816)
(Source)
In our rich consumers’ civilization we spin cocoons around ourselves and get possessed by our possessions.
Maxwell "Max" Lerner (1902-1992) American journalist, columnist, educator
“What Shall I Save?” New York Post (10 Sep 1952)
Reprinted in The Unfinished Country, pt. 1 (1959).
I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can, only as one who has seen its brutality, its stupidity.
Dwight David Eisenhower (1890-1969) American general, US President (1953-61)
Speech, Canadian Club, Ottawa (10 Jan 1946)
Problems are only opportunities in work clothes.
Henry J. Kaiser (1882-1967) American industrialist
(Attributed)
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting, too ….
People in general will much better bear being told of their vices or crimes than of their little failings or weaknesses.
Lord Chesterfield (1694-1773) English statesman, wit [Philip Dormer Stanhope]
Letter to his son, #204 (26 Nov 1749)
(Source)
Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement; nothing can be done without hope.
“Now … if you trust in yourself …”
“Yes?”
“… and believe in your dreams …”
“Yes?”
“… and follow your star …” Miss Tick went on.
“Yes?”
“… you’ll still be beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren’t so lazy.”Terry Pratchett (1948-2015) English author
The Wee Free Men (2003)
Creativity is constantly in danger of being destroyed by success. The more effectively the environment is mastered, the greater is the temptation to rest on one’s oars.
Henry Kissinger (1923-2024) German-American diplomat
The Necessity for Choice: Prospects of American Foreign Policy, 8.3 (1961)
He drew a circle that shut me out —
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But Love and I had the wit to win:
We drew a circle that took him in.Edwin Markham (1852-1940) American poet
“Outwitted”, The Shoes of Happiness, and Other Poems (1913)
I don’t know what you all believe, and I don’t really care — but you have to admit that beliefs are odd. Lots of Christians wear crosses around their necks. You really think when Jesus comes back, he ever wants to see a fucking cross?
Bill Hicks (1961-1994) American stand-up comedian, social critic, satirist, musician [William Melvin "Bill" Hicks]
Relentless (1992)
We have two classes of forecasters: those who don’t know and those who know they don’t know.
John Kenneth Galbraith (1908-2006) Canadian-American economist, diplomat, author
(Attributed)
Variants:
- There are two classes of people who tell what is going to happen in the future: Those who don't know, and those who don't know they don't know.
- You can divide the world into those who don't know and those who don't know they don't know.
- There are those who don't know, and there are those who don't know they don't know.
- We have two kinds of forecasters: Those who don't know ... and those who don't know they don't know.
- There are two kinds of economists: those who don't know the future, and those who don't know they don't know.
Whenever a man does a thoroughly stupid thing, it is always from the noblest motives.
Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) Irish poet, wit, dramatist
The Picture of Dorian Gray, ch. 6 (1891)
He first deceased; she for a little tried
To live without him: liked it not, and died.Henry Wotton (1568-1639) English author, diplomat, politician
“Upon the Death of Sir Albertus Moreton’s Wife” (1651)
MAL: How come you didn’t turn on me, Jayne?
JAYNE: Money wasn’t good enough.
MAL: What happens when it is?
JAYNE: Well, that’ll be an interesting day.
MAL: I imagine it will.Joss Whedon (b. 1964) American screenwriter, author, producer [Joseph Hill Whedon]
Firefly, 1×01 “Serenity” (pilot) (20 Dec 2002)
In reactive problem solving we walk into the future facing the past — we move away from, rather than toward, something. This often results in unforeseen consequences that are more distasteful than the deficiencies removed.
Russell L. Ackoff (1919-2009) American organizational theorist, consultant, management scientist
The Art of Problem Solving (1978)
What a wee little part of a person’s life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his head, and is known to none but himself. All day long, and every day, the mill of his brain is grinding, and his thoughts (which are but the mute articulation of his feelings,) not those other things, are his history. His acts and his words are merely the visible thin crust of his world, with its scarred snow summits and its vacant wastes of water — and they are so trifling a part of his bulk! a mere skin enveloping it. The mass of him is hidden — it and its volcanic fires that toss and boil, and never rest, night nor day. These are his life, and they are not written, and cannot be written. Every day would make a whole book of eighty thousand words — three hundred and sixty-five books a year. Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man — the biography of the man himself cannot be written.
Mark Twain (1835-1910) American writer [pseud. of Samuel Clemens]
The Autobiography of Mark Twain, Vol. 1 (2010)
(Source)
I found America the friendliest, most forgiving, and most generous nation I had ever visited. We South Americans tend to think of things in terms of convenience, whereas people in the United States approach things ethically. This — amateur Protestant that I am — I admired above all. It even helped me overlook skyscrapers, paper bags, television, plastics, and the unholy jungle of gadgets.
Jorge Luis Borges (1899-1986) Argentine writer
“Autobiographical Notes,” The New Yorker (19 Sep 1970)
Ambishun iz like hunger — it obeys no law but its appetight.
[Ambition is like hunger — it obeys no law but its appetite.]Josh Billings (1818-1885) American humorist, aphorist [pseud. of Henry Wheeler Shaw]
Everybody’s Friend, Or; Josh Billing’s Encyclopedia and Proverbial Philosophy of Wit and Humor, “Affurisms,” “Plum Pits” (1874)
(Source)
